While it is no secret that I do not vote Democratic I am old fashioned enough to believe that you work to support those in authority as much as you can without compromising your values and ethics. 

My main issue with the Democratic platform is, and always will be, abortion.  I was glad to read Trench Reynolds this morning who said what I have never really voiced a whole lot…“but because if abortion was legal back in 1968 I might not be here today to tell you my story.”  Except for me it was 1959/60

Anyway…Now and then we will be taking a look at President -elect Obama’s marriage and how it is faring under the stresses and strains of being an American Royal. One thing you have to respect about the Obama’s is their commitment to family and to each other.  This is going to be important in the next four years because literally every stress known to man will seek to crack their fortress and if they haven’t learned to pull closer when threatened then it will be obvious pretty quick.

They have been married since October 3, 1992. Pres. Elect Obama has made family time a priority, spending every Thursday-Sunday at home before heading back to Washington on Monday. That is important.  While many men measure success by what they do at work and how successful they are at it, most women deep down measure it by family time and family cohesiveness.

It is obvious that the Obamas are in love.  Watch them on television or see them in images and you will soon see that they lean into each other, touch a lot, and look into each others eyes.  I find that heartening because those are the things that will allow their marriage to weather the next four years of constant stress. It is important that he be able to continue to make her feel secure and she be able to continue to make him feel like he is all that is man.

My opinion is that in most cases ultimately any person is really only as successful as their marriage is.  The marriage tends to be in our lives what our liver is on our bodies.  It helps filter out things but if we take in too much toxin it gets sick and ceases to function.  Let’s face it, stress can take a toll on marriage.  It will certainly point out all the cracks and weak areas.

The Reagans had a successful marriage.  They were devoted to each other.  I have a lot of respect for Ronald Reagan.   The Obamas are the first couple I have seen in the White House since the Reagans with that type of love and commitment.  Michelle is honest about her husband, yet chooses to respect and adore him despite his faults.

That is the key.  If she can continue to do that, if he can keep his pants zipped in the oval office (unless his wife stops by for a little afternoon delight), and if they can continue to guard their family’s privacy then I think this will be an amazing story to follow.

I wish them well.

Image:Newscom

Post from: Blisstree

Michelle and Barak Obama…The First Marriage

When Marc and I first got married I had a short list in my mind of things that would be deal breakers.

You know, the things that you feel that if they ever happen you are heading for the nearest lawyer?  I think everyone has them, at least mentally.  If he does xyz I am OUT OF HERE….

It’s funny but over the years I have dealt with almost all of those deal breakers and when they actually happened they weren’t deal breakers at all.  They were mountains to climb, challenges to face, problems to over come..but that ’s all.

I finally realized that I don’t have any deal breakers, I only have a strong desire to live the rest of my life with Marc.

The first time I faced a deal breaker event I felt like my insides had been cut out, salted, marinated in jalapeno puree, and then returned to my body…upside down.  But as I considered my options I could not imagine not feeling Marc’s hand on my back, or they way he looks at me sometimes.  I could not imagine not having him fix me coffee and call me on the phone (when he was working he called or emailed daily, no matter what).  Most of all I could not imagine kissing someone else…let alone…you know.

So my choices seemed clear to me. I could walk away and try to start over again or I could hang on and work it out.

I have read alot of information about second marriages.  Alot of the time the spouses take the problems from the first marriage right into the second and if they don’t learn to deal with them properly they find themselves in the same cycles.   This is not a criticism if you are in your second marriage…not at all…just what I have read.

Anyway I figured that there was no way I was going to stay single ..I very much like having a man in my life…and if I left and found someone else I was going ot have to learn to deal with a whole new set of issues.

My choice was to stay …and push through.

Because I chose to stay when the first deal breaker happened the next time something came up it was less difficult to know that we could work through it…and so on.

When we have issues come up now it is less of a challenge.  The decision has been made, we just need to figure out how to make things work.

Every strong marriage I know has faced hardship of some sort. Health issues,  infidelity, anger issues, money difficulties, in laws, children, and on and one.  They remain strong for one reason and one reason only…

Good marriages are not marriages without problems, they are marriages without deal breakers.

Image:Morguefile

Post from: Blisstree

Do You Have a Deal Breaker?