Do you enjoy tea time with your Alzheimer’s family member…or have memories of family rituals involving them?  Afternoon tea was an everyday occurrence at my grandmother’s when I was growing up. 

Nanny would have her cup of tea while my aunts often sipped their coffee.  When I visited them at their Trails End Farm, I looked forward to 3 o’clock when we stopped quilting, sewing, cooking, cleaning or other tasks and sat at the table with tea, coffee, milk and cookies while we laughed and chatted.  Anyone visiting was invited to join in.

Tea for hospitality became a habit with my mom, too, one we continued even after she acquired Alzheimer’s and lived in a nursing home.  My grandchildren often visited her with me and looked forward to snacks while Mother and I sipped tea.

For Christmas this year, my daughter gave me a glass mug with tea infuser.   It also included a “tea flower” consisting of green tea scented with jasmine flowers.  This made delicious tea, actually cup after cup to keep me going the whole afternoon.  Now I’ve got to experiment with different teas and get some more flowers.

Do you have a favorite tea?  Or tea ritual?  I like to start the morning with English breakfast tea or Darjeeling.  Earl Grey is one I enjoy during the day.  I must see what flavors I can find for tea flowers, too.

How about relaxing with your Alzheimer’s family member over a cup of tea?  You may create some memories as my grandchildren and I have of tea time with Mother.

(c)2007 Mary Emma Allen

Technorati Tags: Darjeeling, English breakfast tea, quilters, quilting, tea+party, tea flower, tea infuser, tea time, Trails End Farm 

Post from: Blisstree

Memories of Tea Time Family Rituals

“Don’t look at me,” he remarked.  “Look at Mother!”

Sure enough, my mom was happily munching my hamburger, having finished hers.

This became a challenge at meal time.  Mother might finish something she liked, then look around for more, not realizing my plate or Jim’s wasn’t a platter for her to select from.  This also became a problem at the nursing home I used for day care. She either helped her neighbors cut their meat or took it for her own.  Finally they sat her at a TV tray by herself, yet in the dining room.

I recall my aunt’s love of sweets as she journeyed into Alzheimer’s.  This also didn’t help her diabetes, which generally could be controlled by watching her diet, not medication. 

When she lived with my mom, who was showing the initial signs of Alzheimer’s, I became involved in Auntie’s care.  We had to hide sweets so Auntie wouldn’t find them and eat too much.  Her judgment about food choices was like a child’s

But I recall her delight when we could let her indulge…the beaming smile that lit her face as she observed an eclair on her plate. 

Tea parties with Mother created fond memories for my grandchildren and me.  Mother had a custom (handed down from her mother) of offering a cup of tea whenever someone visited her home.  She and I often chatted over tea and snacks and caught up on family news.  So it seemed natural to continue this practice in the nursing home.

My grandchildren soon looked forward to “tea parties with Great Grandma.”  We’d bring muffins or cookies, perhaps cheese and crackers, with us and make tea at the nurses’ station.  Or I might pick up something at the nearby fast food restaurant and get the children kiddie meals.

When Mother became increasingly unable to feed herself, we had to do it.  One day I wasn’t paying attention so my 6-year old granddaughter reminded, “Nanny, feed your mother.”  It seemed the most natural activity to Kara that we did this so Great Grandma could enjoy the party, too.

Perhaps you can initiate a tea party or some other activity involving food for your family and family member with Alzheimer’s.  These make for wonderful memories, too.

Post from: Blisstree

Food Memories of an Alzheimer’s Caregiver