We began working together on Pet Set with nothing to go on but my vision of what the company was going to be…and it was a blurry vision.

Today, we have a small, young company with many beautifully designed products — thanks to Colleen’s artistic talent, and a pretty seamless printing and distribution mechanism — thanks to Jo’s dedication and knowledge about the printing business.

Not everyday is heaven on earth with them — we each see life from vastly different perspectives. AND, we are women, of course.

If we were TV characters, I like to think of us as Friends: Colleen is Pheobe, Jo is Rachael, and I am Monica…but we are all a little like Carrie from Sex in the City. (Although, I’m more Miranda).

I truly believe that I would not have been able to launch The Pet Set without their help. So, ladies — THANK YOU.

Post from: Blisstree

Three Women Who Started A Business Together

I wasn’t sure about the whole packing thing, because I’ve calculated that since I started The Pet Set, much of my wardrobe harkens back to the late 1990’s…(can you say Delorean?)

Years ago, when I was working at Mercedes-Benz, I bought the cutest little spaghetti-strapped, little black dress for, ironically, a business trip in Vegas.

Since that time, I haven’t worn this piece once, although it’s been packed about a hundred times.

It’s been to Vegas, Palm Beach, Phili, Maine, NYC, San Francisco, London, LBI New Jersey, Phoenix, and back to Vegas, but never worn.

I know what the problem is, I know longer have my 1990’s body and plus it never really fit that well.

So, while I was sitting at the pool, feeling so self-conscious about my 2007 body, a light bulb went off…this little black dress would make the perfect beach cover-up!

So, there you have it, my dress replaced my 1980’s beach cover up, that has never been worn!

Can ya’ say make-over!

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The Dress That Went To Vegas

Many times, you’ll hear everyone from career counseling coaches to Donald Trump say “You Have To Love What You Do.”

Yet, those words often sound so vague to me. What does it mean to LOVE what you do?

I think it means you have to be moved somehow…your soul has to has to scream…This Is It! This Is Me!

Or you have to drool.

I swear, had I not started The Pet Set, I would be in the fashion industry. I love my business…it’s part of my fabric (ha..get it?).

But when I see a Ralph Lauren gown or one of his lush suede boots, literally, I drool.

Not because I want to own the item (oh, come on) but because I wish I could have designed it.

The problem with my “drool” philosophy (aside from its revolting aspect) is that unless you are a child prodigy, you often don’t have a clue about what moves you until much later on.

By that time, your true calling has been camouflaged by life’s demands and/or toddlers.

My suggestion is to start to pay attention to those things that honestly stir something inside…and I don’t mean simply I luuuuve ice cream.

I mean I would quit my job tomorrow if I could become a chef. See the difference?

Become really observant about your world, recognize what your senses are telling you. You WILL hear the scream…or experience the drool, I promise.

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How To Know What Career You Were Meant For?

As I reviewed my e-mails yesterday, there in front of me, like a marquee in Times Square, blared the sentence that I have dreaded, since I launched The Pet Set, two years ago, this month.

My customer’s note read: “We are not doing well with the cards I chose at all. Any suggestions? I literally have not sold a single item from you yet.”

Oh my god!…instant emotional downward spiral.

I am mortified to share this story with you, but I want to give you some advice on how to handle such a situation — which, clearly we experience on some level everyday: some drastic — like this one, and some not so drastic — like the landscaper mowed over your flower bed.

Your mother was right to tell you — Tomorrow will be a better day.

The temptation, after seeing the note, was to call the client or send an emotional note to the tune of: “…do you even know what you’re doing?” (Actually, I couldn’t have called her, I would have ended up sobbing into the phone.)

Instead — I waited. I waited until after the crying, after the self-persecution (I’m an idiot, my business is going down the toilet, I’ll end up working at Burger King) and after the embarrassment of it all — which truthfully — was probably the root cause of my melt down.

Do you see why I needed to wait?…my thought process was so silly…I know my stationery sells…it have sold!

Giving myself a chance to review every scenario I could about why my cards were not selling at this particular customer’s shop — I sat down and wrote her a note, extending my empathy and offering her some merchandising advice.

Why was this pause a good strategy? Because if I had shot off a nasty or critical message from the start, I would have risked losing a customer and, worse, harmed my and my business reputation.

I am still at risk of losing her, but at least I know I did not let my emotions sabotage me.

So, if it’s your boss or mate or kid or whatever…sleep on it, or at least wait for a half hour.

Oh and watching reruns of Sex and the City helps too.

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The Best Way To Avoid Self-Sabotage

This question appears somewhere on-line several times a month.

As you might imagine, there are infinite lists, opinions, rants and advice — about how to recognize when it’s time to leave your company…including the most obvious signal: the money isn’t there for you.

For me, the warning signs were typical and maybe even subtle at first — you know — more personal days, poor eating and sleeping habits…and

lordy! the occasional crying fit. (out on the streets of NYC, of course — never in the ladies room:).

Later in my career, the actual message came in the form of a physical and emotional collapse on my way to work one morning.

I got the shakes, I couldn’t breath…the whole nine yards. I simply had to quit that day.

The only reason I was able to make such a dramatic and life-changing move was because already knew what I wanted to do instead.

The Pet Set had already begun to take form — way before I started at this company.

So if I may, that would be my advice to you, if you think you’ve absolutely had enough…before you let the door hit you in the behind…have a PLAN.

If you can’t answer the question, what am I good at or what am I passionate about, it’s not time for you to quit. (unless you’re rich.)

Also, I’ve dealt with career counselors over the years…a really good one can help you put a career or life plan together, help you focus and even help you plan your resignation strategy.

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When Is It Time To Quit Your Job?

I went from making a significant salary with long hours…to $0 salary and inSANE hours. There isn’t one moment of the day when I am not thinking about The Pet Set.

There are 2, and only 2 things that a small business owner (any business really) should be spending the most time on. Getting customers (sales) and keeping customers (service).

Intellectually, I know that is how my business will grow and become successful…and that maybe someday, I’ll be able to purchase my own lingerie without asking my husband for money.

But here’s the rub, I’m home alone all day…sometimes 14 hours until my husband returns from work.

This makes trying to stay disciplined enough to make those excruciating cold calls, writing the press releases, checking in on current clients and whatever else it takes to bring exposure to my company…a very difficult existence.

But I’m trying. The fact that Rachael Ray is on right now, and that the dog has to go out…may mean that phoning Vogue to see what they thought about my samples…will have to wait.

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How Should An Entrepreneur Spend Her Time?

While wandering around the great ocean of blogs known as My Blog Log, I stumbled upon a small business site on which resided an article by the Gallup Management Journal.

Here is the headline text that so harshly welcomed me to 2007:

Yikes!
Here is a portion of the excerpt that had me examining my strengths and weaknesses for days: (Marcus Buckingham and Donald O. Clifton)

• You may be reluctant to investigate your strengths quite simply because you don’t believe that your true self is much to write home about. Whatever the label — a feeling of inadequacy or “imposter syndrome” or plain old insecurity — the symptoms are familiar. Despite your achievements, you wonder whether you are as talented as everyone thinks you are. You suspect that luck and circumstance, not your strengths, might explain much of your success. The anxious little voice in your ear whispers, “When will you be found out?” and, against your better judgment, you listen.
• In part this explains why, when asked to describe their strengths, people rarely refer to their natural talents. Instead, they talk about external things that they have gathered during their life, such as certificates and diplomas, experiences and awards. Here is the “proof” that they have improved themselves, that they have acquired something valuable to offer.

I am so guilty of this self-sabotaging behavior (to borrow a worn out phrase)…when asked what my strengths are, I just sit there and stare into space.

On the other hand, I know I must have strengths, otherwise, how could The Pet Set have been conceived and executed?

For some reason, at least for me, I am quite nimble at rattling off my weaknesses…otherwise I’d have been on the Oprah show by now and the Pet Set would have been selected as one of her favorites!

I’ve read many self-help/coaching books throughout my adult life…I think this book may actually help guide me toward identifying and leveraging my strengths.

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Is Fear Hiding Your Successful Self?

I thought if there were any of you out there who do own or plan to own a business, you might want to look into two groups in particular: National Minority Supplier Development Council and Women’s Business Enterprise National Council.

The application process is lengthy and detailed in both cases…but I think the benefits will be rich.

Not only might I become an official vendor of one of these stores, but the resources available to a business such as mine could be quite valuable.

And if you do not own a business of your own, you might want to become a catalyst within your own firm to promote the importance of doing business with women owned companies.

After all…women do business differently and better.

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Opportunities For Women and Minority Run Businesses.

There was our most significant hope for a female President…joshing around with Rosie and Joy. (What’s up with Rosie lately, she’s getting just about everyone all upset.)
Everything was going along nicely — with her faux-moderate/mommy tone…very fluffy and soft on Hillary’s part.

Then at the end of the inverview(?), she uttered these words: (roughly)

We live in country in which you can grow up to be anything you want…and hopefully President of the United States…EVEN IF YOU ARE A GIRL.

How is it in this day and age we still say things like this about the abilities of women. There will never be a woman President if we keep talking like that.

I say that come the next election, there should be a new referendum that forces us to change the language we use when talking about female Presidential hopefuls:

• You can be anything you want to be in this country, even President…ESPECIALLY BECAUSE YOU ARE A WOMAN.

Hillary even went as far as admitting that a female President is “…such a leap of faith…” Oh my gosh — What is that!

While we’re at it, let’s all stop using the word minorities. There are no longer minorities, just very, very refined, segmented villages of our population.

I am in the the village of The Female Entreprenuer , the Chocolate Labrador Mom, who buys expensive footwear, who lives in the suburbs of NYC, and who is a chef groupie.

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There Will Never Be A Woman U.S. President: The Language of Politics.

His stress with work, and mine with The Pet Set ,the house, the dog and everything else — left us bickering, rather than looking forward to planning for the holidays.

Normally, I would decorate the house with traditional symbols of Christmas, like a big Douglas Fir tree, covered with our personal ornaments and mementos, all very Merchant Ivory.

But because we’ve both been so busy this year dealing with the unmercifulness of life, I thought what is needed this year is plastic Christmas!

So, I might just take my cue from my favorite dramedy, Ugly Betty.

Check out this FABULOUS Tree:

It’s a shoe tree! Get it?

Real life, schmeal Life.

Images: ABC.com

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The Best Christmas Tree Ever!