The main thing to remember is that if you want it to work, then make it a priority.  Set aside just a few minutes every week to keep in touch.  I’ve moved around a lot over the last ten years, so here are some ideas for maintaining long distance friendships:

• Scheduled monthly or weekly phone calls – Plan a specific day each month or week to call each other.  Even if you don’t think you have much to say, it helps you to keep each other updated on just the small things in your lives.
• Frequent emails – If you are more of an email person (like me) shoot out little emails frequently.  Just send a few sentences, weblinks, articles, or images that remind you of something you would have shared if you still lived in the same place.  Again, keeping in touch about the small things maintains a better friendship than just summarizing your life once a year.
• Yearly trip – Plan far in advance so you make sure that all of the friends can adjust their schedules accordingly and take advantage of the lowest prices possible.  I know a lot of people who have been planning yearly trips with the same group of friends since college, and it definitely lasts through the years!  Usually you probably travel with your spouse/significant other, but plan a trip with your long distance friend to meet up in a foreign place.  You will get to spend lots of quality time together.
• Instant messaging – There are many interfaces out there, but choose one that is paired with your email so whenever you are reading your email you can also take a moment to say hello to your friends.  This is definitely the best way for me.
• Birthdays and holidays – Make a special effort to remember these days.  Sometimes you might even spend them together, but if not then be sure to make a phonecall.

I purposely did not include social networking sites like Facebook because I don’t believe that these are ways to really maintain a friendship…in fact, I think they are the opposite.  If you are reading updates about someone’s life through a website then you will have no reason to actually contact them to ask important questions and catch up.  You probably know all about what they do everyday, but don’t actually have any personal interactions.  These are good for peripheral friendships, but not for your closest friends.

The main thing to remember is just that it only takes a few minutes out of every week to show a friend that you are thinking about them.  I know it’s super hard when you have the life happening around you to handle also, but close friendships are important to maintain in your life, even if they take a little extra effort.

Let me know if you have any special ways that you have maintained a long distance friendship that has lasted over the years…

Image: Flickr

Post from: Blisstree

How to Maintain Long Distance Friendships

1. The bed is smaller.
2. The bed is warmer.
3. The mornings are quieter… because I’m back in the office and starting them before everyone again.
4. The days are also quieter, but just as busy.
5. They’re a bit lonely, too.
6. But, I get “Pinged!” on Skype throughout the day.
7. I look forward to meal times, because I get to return to my family… except for lunches this week, when I was still catching up from my time out of the office.
8. The line for our bathroom is a little longer.
9. The kids are up a bit later. Kerri and I combined have more energy and patience; on our own we are SO ready for bedtime.
10. My evenings are not lonely. (We watched Numb3rs together last night. Yay!)
11. There is more – and better – food. (Right now there are homemade biscotti; cinnamon rolls and lemon meringue pie for tomorrow; and a variety of pork from one of the the vendors at the market.
12. Things aren’t always where I left them.
13. There is more conversation; more smiles; and more laughs.

Post from: Blisstree

Reacclimation – 13 Things I’ve Noticed Since My Wife Got Back

Yeah, yeah, it’s important, we know.

But how much time do you actually spend apart from one another?

I have to admit that we are together quite a lot. Bald Man’s job doesn’t required much traveling for him. I don’t tend to get out of town all too often (though I do like to get out of town with friends!). We’re pretty much homebodies, and we’re good with that.

However, the kids and I will be taking off for a few days soon, and it’ll be the longest we’ve been away from Bald Man for a while. Might be the longest ever that the youngest has been away from his dad.

It’s not a big deal, really. Just four nights. But I know I’ll be the worse off, mostly just because I depend on him so much! I mean, I’ll miss his smiling face, his corny jokes, his good-morning kiss (I’m usually almost awake enough to have that register in the morning!). But I’ll also miss the diapers that he changes (though we’re getting close to being done with those!), his help with dinner, and just winding down and chatting about our days together while he rubs my feet and paints my toenails (ha—that doesn’t happen ).

Okay, so, four days and I’m talking like it’s three months! I could never be a military wife….but that’s a post for another day. Seriously, though, they rock.

How about you? Do you spend much time apart? By choice or by chance?

photo credit: RBerteig

Post from: Blisstree

How much time to you spend apart?

But, it has me thinking again of where we’d want to go together. We didn’t have a honeymoon (funds were tight at the time), but were able to put together a fairly reasonably priced trip to Hawaii a few months before our oldest was born. We had a good time (hard not to there!), but since it was the first real trip we’d taken as a couple, we realized that there were still so many things that we had to learn about each other, including how to vacation together!

Other than that trip 7 years ago, we’ve only had one other weekend getaway together (as far as I can remember), so I’m thinking now of even what we’d want to do this time. Hawaii’s not in the picture this year, but maybe we could swing a bed and breakfast for a few days or something.

Are you able to get away together as a couple? Where do you go? Any place you’d highly recommend in the US Midwest?

photo credit: raqui09

Post from: Blisstree

Come Sail Away With Me…