Government influence in our family lives
February 11, 2009 by kellys
Filed under family, financial matters, news, odds and ends
Karen wrote a post about the mom who had octuplets in California. Let me be politically incorrect here… Be very careful how quickly you ask the government to step in and help those kids. No matter what our opinion of these kids and their mom is, do you really want the government to step in and take them simply because there are too many in your opinion? I am pregnant with my third child and have had many comments directed at me that I should have stopped with my perfect family: husband, wife, daughter, and son.
Who is to say that in a few years, if we let the government step in with this mom, then they can’t step in with my family and say that we have too many kids. There might be a family with a bigger house, more money, better private health care, and more family support that can take better care of my kids than I can. If you let them step in here, when there is technically no abuse present, then they will eventually take the right to dictate my life as well.
I agree that if this young lady can’t pay for her kids, then she shouldn’t have had so many on a voluntary basis. However, who is to say that if you have more than 1 child in 5 years and you fall on hard times, that the government, instead of giving you money and food stamps, won’t just take your kids and put them in the system because the feel they can better take care of them than you can. You guys are walking on a very fine tight rope here. As long as those kids don’t have bruises, aren’t being verbally abused, and are eating well and being nourished properly, let her raise those kids in private. You might not agree with her, but is her right to do so.
Some of you are already saying that I am off my rocker and the government will never go that far. CAREFUL! They already tell your doctor how, when, and to what extent they can treat you. They have set ridiculous limits on treatments recently that have severely limited my scope of practice in the local cath lab. My patients are suffering embarrassing accidents and strained bladders due to the new restrictions Medicare has placed on health care facilities. They are nit picking and not taking care of the pillaging that is going on in the financial side of health care. They should be much more concerned with fraud than my capability to ease the discomfort of my patients while using proven methods that have works for decades and are very appreciated by my patients.
I promise you, you do not want the government stepping in any further than they already have! As a matter of fact, I would love to see them step back. If I think a bank or store is not being run improperly, then I choose to not give them my money. That is the way to get rid of the badly run businesses. Don’t ask the government to do it. They evidently can’t pay their own taxes and figure out who is legal and illegal and can’t remember their own addresses and can’t stay faithful to their own spouses. Why in the world do you want them taking care of your family and health care and your taxes and your paycheck and your retirement etc…
that scares me! i’ve been saying the same sort of thing.
The problem is one person cannot care for that many kids that age. No day care or school can have that ratio of children to adults. And they are trained in taking care of children. I don’t think all of the kids can be properly taken care of in that type of situation.
Hi,
Good insight! The government is already trying to remove the rights of parents and place them into the hands of the government and international law. Read the Parental Rights Act and see for yourself. This treaty is being pushed by the current administration and would remove not only our parental rights, but put us under international law with the United Nations in charge!! American families need to pay attention and voice our opinions to our Senators before it is too late. This treaty has not yet been ratified by our Senate, so speak out!! I think “government” needs to back off and get their own affairs in order and not continually infringe on the freedoms America was founded on. We are quickly becoming the very beast we fled from in the first place! Best Regards.
I agree. We do not need more government control, we need less. Bad stuff happens to good people, but good people find a way through it. I am capable of making good decisions for myself and my family, just like most people are, and I don’t need someone else stepping in to make decisions for me.
Exactly! Which is why i might not be able to do much but when I see someone who needs help, then I help. That is the way I firmly believe it should be. Government help should be the exception, not the given or an entitlement! I’m so frustrated and it seems to be only getting worse!!!!!!!!!!
Sarah, 50 years ago, a family of 6 was a small family. That is what I am talking about. We have a different perspective today. I absolutely know I couldn’t handle 6 kids by myself but when you look at bigger families, some of those families look very happy and well adjusted. Granted I know a family of 9 kids and I don’t htink they are taken care of very well but that is my opinion. They aren’t malnourished and not abused so I can just pray for them and hope they turn out well.
But I don’t want the government making that decision for me. The last generation survived and so will we.
So I think it should be
My husband and I were discussing this the other night and he reminded me that there was another political leader that once wanted to limit the number of children people could have and who could have children. Yes, that would be Hitler.
We may not agree with what this woman has done, but taking her children (especially with the current way that the foster system is being run) would, in my opinion, be much worse for those children.
Bri made a good point about the history of Hitler attempting to limit family size. A similar government clamp down went on with China causing many babies to be killed, especially baby girls. Not all of them end up adopted into well-intentioned American families.
It’s not up to government to make these decisions, but clearly, this woman with 8 babies, plus many young children already at home, made an unwise decision. While I don’t think the government should necessarily “take” them, I also don’t feel it is right that the government have to support them through welfare!! If she cannot support them financially, as well as emotionally, spiritually, etc., then she has no business going to these extremes.
Well said, Bette!
K’s I dont think the 14 children is any problem in and of itself….the problem is 14 children under 7 years old. More power to people who have 14 or 18 kids. That have the support system, emotionally, monetarily and spirituality. Not to mention the age difference a 10 year old is way more capable of taking care of himself or others than a 7 year old. She obviously can’t provide all that. If taxpayers money is going to be spent on them, they should at least have the opprotunity to have these things. Maybe she will prove otherwise that she can support these children. I would love for her to prove me wrong.
I think many people’s issue is that the government is paying for her to raise her children-I heard on the radio today that the state of california provides her with $80,000.00 per year in aid JUST for the 6 children she already has. And that with the additional children, she will be taking home over 2 MILLION dollars in aid. That money comes from the tax payers. We have SOOOO many issues with the money we have as a country, let alone states (from what I hear, california is going bankrupt), that we will probably buckle under this strain. I agree with you, that we can’t just take away her children or tell her how many she can have–I do believe it was a horrible decision on her part, but it’s not my life. There are many families in this country who have that many children-they just had them one at a time, over many many years. We don’t say anything to them about it. I do agree w/ the one woman that the children to teacher ratio is less than the 14 children this woman has, but hopefully she’ll be able to make do. Maybe, if need be, the state/government can put a cap on her aid, or possibly provide her with career training & daycare assistance. That would probably make everyone happy.
This makes me wonder…how many families are out there that currently have 14 children? Married or not. We wouldn’t be paying so much attention to this woman if she didn’t have her 14 children as multiples so close in age.
i’m really split on this whole debate. realistically…can one single woman possibly care for 14 children? of course. can one single woman possibly care for 10 children under the age of 2…eight being fragile preemies? yes, it can be done…but not alone. if she can garner up enough of a support system…family, friends possibly church members.. to help her with the bathing; feeding; holding; changing…at least until their first year….possibly it can be done. trying to do it totally on her own…i don’t know. she has to sleep at some point…we all know how sleep deprived we can become with one or two newborns plus the others who despaerately need our attention.
should the government step in and take them just because of her family size? no, absolutely not. john and kate had 6…they got their own reality show and are profitting big time by exploiting their kids and family (my opinion of course.) one does have to wonder if that might have been this mom’s plan…make it big on tv…therefore providing the money and life neccessities for her family…not too smart of a move if that was the plan.
i do think she’ll be closely monitored as the babies will be high needs at least foir awhile. if, and this is a BIG if…the children are not being cared for then yes…place them somewhere where they can be or offer her the help she needs ( as a foster mom i’ve seen ALL kinds of services being offered and rejected by many many families). that will also mean splitting the babies up into smaller groups because no foster parent will be allowed to have all 8…rules are (even though from personal experience, the rules can be bent if necessary) no more than 4 children under the age of 6 and no more than 8 children under the age of 16.)
in the mean time…if she’s on the up and up and just wants to raise her family, then she has my prayers for strength; patience; and wisdom.
another thought for her though….if she had JUST wanted more children…to increase her family size…has she never heard of the thousands of children in need of a foster/adoptive home? yep, right here in our own country…she could have had what she wanted and helped to lighten the load of waiting children all at once. let’s just hope her’s won’t be added to that list.
one more thought…i agree with all who are tired of the government interfering in family life. as parents, we need to be able to raise our children without fear of reprisal from the government. i think you’d see a lot less crime from young offenders; respect for authority in schools and else where and more responsible young adults if children weren’t being raised in such a permissive “me me me” society. again, just my opinion.
Mom of 14. I was waiting for you to find us here. I was dieing to hear what you had to say. Very good thoughts. Thanks for chiming in.