• An unusual increase of ATM withdrawals and/or credit card cash advances.
• Failure to mention overtime, bonuses, or an increase in pay.
• Unusual purchases to places such as flower shops, jewelry stores, women’s clothing stores, etc.
• An increase in cell phone minutes used, possibly going over the monthly limit.
• A liquidation of assets such as IRAs, saving accounts, money market accounts, etc.
• Avoidance of discussing money issues, the family budget, and spending habits.
• An increase in spending for things such as gasoline, eating out, clothing, and hygiene products.
• A decrease in the amount deposited from his paycheck.
• Running out of money before the next payday.
• Salary discrepencies on the W-2.  This goes along with the issue of money earned versus the overtime he claimed he was working.  Also, look for unexplained business travel expenses.

Other helpful resources:
Infidelity Advice
Women’s Divorce: Signs of Cheating
Divorce Hq:  How to Tell if Your Spouse is Cheating

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Post from: Thrifty Mommy

They say opposites attract and I guess that can be true of friendships as well.  I have had three close friendships.  I’m talking tight, share all secrets with girlfriends.  All three of these ladies had issues with spending.  After being friends with them for a while, I noticed that all of them began to tone down their spending, their impulsive shopping, their wild credit card spending, and they began to look for bargains on the things they purchased. 

Of course when you are close friends with someone, you talk about life.  You talk about the things you buy, the reasons you buy them, what your long term goals are, what you’re saving for, and if money is tight you talk about that too.  Here are some things I have mentioned to my friends that I feel has caused them to be more aware of their spending:

• My objection to car payments – Try to save for a vehicle, pay cash if possible, finance as little as possible, don’t go for a high dollar car, and also the crazy depreciation rates.
• Don’t charge it – Basically, if you can’t afford to pay cash for it, you don’t need it.
• Impulse shopping – Avoid making impulse purchases. Think about it.  Plan for it.  Decide if you can afford it.
• Comparison shop – Look around for the best bargain.  Shop the sales.
• Use coupons – Try to use coupons on groceries, dining out, and entertainment.
• Plan for the future – Leave within your means and save for the future.  Save for a rainy day so that you don’t have to use credit for emergencies.

Have your finances affected your friends?

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Post from: Thrifty Mommy

There are some ways to make sure you get your rebate money.

1)  Make copies of everything before you send it in. My husband and I always make a copy of all of the paperwork.  This includes the papers we filled out, the receipt, UPC, and any other information that we send in.  We also write the date mailed on top of the paperwork and file it away.

2)  Follow the instructions. Follow the exact instructions on the rebate, no matter how silly they sound.  Be sure to include the original receipt (if stated on the form), completed paperwork, any labels or UPC labels specified.

3)  Mail the paperwork immediately. This is one of the major causes of unclaimed rebates.  We get home, open up our new gadgets, and forget to send off the rebate before it expires.  Send it off immediately!

4)  Check your mail carefully. Many times rebates come in an envelope that looks a lot like junk mail.  I have almost thrown out some rebate checks.  Be careful.

5)  Put a reminder on your calendar. It’s easy to forget about the money that’s due to you.  If the rebate says to expect your money in 6-8 weeks, then be sure to mark it on your calendar around that time.  That way you’ll be sure to follow up if you haven’t received your rebate back in time.

Have you ever had any problems collecting money from rebates?

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Post from: Thrifty Mommy

Telling our kids “no” is inevitable.  Here are some tips to make it a little easier.

1)  Use emphathetic and understanding statements. “I understand that you want this new outfit for the dance, but it’s not in the budget.  Maybe we could find something on the clearance rack or at the thrift store that you would like.”  “I’m sorry that you feel this way.”

2)  Teach them to be creative and unique. Show your child how to create their own style.  Teach them how to repurpose old things.

3)  Provide them opportunities to earn money. If your child wants something special then tell them they can have it so long as they earn the money.  You can even explain how you work for the things the family has.

4)  Compromise. If your child really wants something and you can tell it’s not just a passing thought, then find a way to work with them.  If the item is $75, then maybe they can earn half of the money through extra chores around the house and you can pay for the rest of the item.

5)  Set an example. If you are out frivilously spending money and making impulse purchases, then you are teaching your children that this kind of behavior is acceptable.  Yes, you’re the adult and you can make your own decisions, but it’s wise to teach your children how to make smart financial choices.

Do you have any tips for telling children “no”?

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Post from: Thrifty Mommy

According to a new study, savers are attracted to spenders.  How can this be?  With all of the fussing, arguing, and disagreeing over money, why would spenders and savers be attracted to one another?  Most people say that they would rather marry someone with similar views on money management.  Who wouldn’t? Despite this logical reasoning, people seem to marry their financial opposite.

Could it be that deep down we are longing for someone to bring out a balance in us?  Without realizing it, could I be glad that someone encourages me to buy things and have a free attitude?  Or did all of this just happen by coincidence? 

What are your thoughts on this?  Did you marry your financial opposite?

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Post from: Thrifty Mommy

A few years ago, I send out an email ranting to my friends about Americans being frivilous and spending more money than they made.  If I remember correctly, at that time, Americans were spending $1.50 for each dollar they made.  That meant that we were in debt; in big time debt.  Being in debt like that really bothered me.  We are so blessed in this country, yet we’re unbelievably materialistic and we feel entitled to having everything.  That ranting email is actually what landed me this job of writing for Thrifty Mommy.  Funny, huh?

Fast forward three years later and we’re in a recession.  People are struggling more than they have in years.  Yet one thing we’ve finally figured out how to do is save our money.  Americans are finally putting money into the bank and saving it.  We’re spending less, living within our means, and saving money for a rainy day.  To me, that’s good news!

What positives have you found to this recession?

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Here’s a few things I tweeted or heard Dave say during the event:

• When things are going well, we get a little sloppy.  We’ve become a bit sloppy. 
• When things are going good any idiot could make it.  Even a turkey can fly in a tornado.  Stupidity has been officially stress tested.
• When the tide goes out you can tell who was skinny dipping.
• Fear is not a Fruit of the Spirit.
• Bush decided to bailout stupidity and then the new administration decided to stimulate stupidity.  I’m not a big fan of government interference in the marketplace.
• You can be sincere and still be wrong.
• I’m a believer in capitalism, but the not the kind of capitalism we’re seeing.
• Those of us in business are supposed to take care of our customers, not milk them like a cow.
• Commerce without morality will destroy us. ~Ghandi
• Life’s not fair. Sometimes it hurts. We need to allow failure. Failure is good. Failure brings clarity. It’s cleansing. Failure will steer you toward excellence.  A little desperation is good for the soul.
• I don’t do business with big banks because they have no soul.  Use a local hometown bank.

Listen to Town Hall for Hope for free on Hulu.

Post from: Thrifty Mommy

A study of Harvard graduates showed that those with with written goals achieve more than others.  Some words from Dave Ramsey:

Your budget is a written goal for your money.  People who win at anything have written goals.  Goals are what you are aiming at.  Your money won’t behave unless you tame it.  You need to have a budget for every month.  Spend every dollar on paper before the month begins. Give every dollar of your income a name before the month begins.  This is called zero-based budgeting.  Income-outgo=exactly zero.  Match up every income dollar until you have given it an outgo name (this includes savings).

We have learned the importance of saving for rainy days and having an emergency fund.  We are trying to live a debt free life, even with two house payments.  (Yes, it still hasn’t sold!)

How is your budget?

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Post from: Thrifty Mommy

One of Dave Ramsey’s tips for budgeting is to use an envelope system.  You simply make an envelope for every area spending which can include: groceries, gas, childcare, entertainment/eating out, clothing, and more.  The envelope system is a great way to keep you from spending more than you had allotted.  It may take a few pay periods to find the right amount for each category.

No Credit Needed has posted a great envelope tutorial on youtube.  Check it out.

Are any of you using the envelope system?

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Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

Post from: Thrifty Mommy