A Ray of Hope
January 3, 2009 by Anna Farmery
Filed under Affirmations of Life
This morning I woke, the bedroom was very dark except for a ray of incredibly bright light shining through the smallest crack in the curtains. It was a wonderful way to start the day, as I felt that he was sending me a clear message from the heavens above…for all the darkness that surronds you, the smallest ray of hope is worth holding on to and enjoying.
I went down stairs and figured there were many rays of hopes for all of us widows and widowers, here are some I jotted down
- The smile that I made when I saw a young couple very much in love on the bus…
- The laughter that I heard around the table at Christmas
- My laughter that showed I was capable of enjoying others company without feeling guilty.
- The hour when I was talking to friends over Christmas when I didn’t think about the grief
- The holding of my hand by my Nana who has survived 15 years without her rock.
- The slight twinkle in my eye when a young man smiled at me the other day. OK I ran off in the opposite direction but I enjoyed the feeling in the moment….
In your darkness, remember the ray of hopes that sprinkle your life and learn to value them strongly to help guide you through the darkness.
This if just the entry that I needed today. You see, it was one year ago today that my husband had his first seizure and we rushed him to the hospital. That night, they found the brain tumour that would take his life five months later. In a way this is the anniversary of the day my life changed forever. I am feeling blue today but also hopeful that life brings some good things to me in the future.
Reading your entry today made me smile and I am holding on to my ray of hope for the future. Thank you.
Once again Anna, you have given me a glimmer of hope. It was another bad day although it did start well. I will start trying to make note of the rays of hope in my days.
Can someone tell me how to start new posts in here and how to use things like bullets etc? I have never been in a blog before and there must be a better way than this little submit screen?
Thanks all!
Thanks Anna, your timing was the best. Dave took his last breath six months ago today, I have had a rather tough day but the last few have been. There are glimmers of hope out there, I just need to get back to my optomistic way and see them, thank you for reminding me!
I immediately focused on your last “ray of hope” about the young man smiling at you. Way to go, Anna! Wonderful for that to happen, isn’t it? I hope to someday find someone to share my life with, and that gave me hope. It is very lonely, living alone and being so far away from family (for me).
OOOH Jessica not sure I am ready for that step but I was surprised that I enjoyed the experience which may be the first step?
If it doesn’t sound corny every comment on this blog is a ray of hope for me….you know I feel 2009 is going to be a great year for us all. It will be nice to hear about all our progress throughout the year….somehow I feel connected to everyone and my hope is that we grow together
Anna, I confesss that the last comment hit very close to home for me. My sister and her significant other (dumb phrase, but what do you call a man age 63 – boyfriend?) introduced me to a friend of his. We clicked and have been e-mailing several times a day. We have similar senses of humor, and he is a “hometown” guy who grew up in the same area of small towns that I did, but he was 3 years older and obviously out of my dating-age range way back then. We are not rushing things and he is quite aware of my history, my recent loss. I do not have false hopes, but it is nice to make a connection with someone who shares some of your values, is willing to be honest, etc. I most definitely am not going to push this, but rather let it play out and see where it goes. And actually, the biggest benefit of this IS the distance that we live from each other. It really forces us to get to know each other slowly, which I find is the best way of all. It was a mood brightener over the holidays, when I expected to be very glum and sad. Just wanted to share that, and hope I didn’t scandalize anyone. I certainly know enough to be careful about jumping into this. Slowly and surely, is my way. I hope this doesn’t bring on a storm of criticism for my hopefullness. I am so glad to see your positive attitude, Anna. I think it is one that we should all try to have this new year of 2009. Funny, but I HAD decided to look forward, to move forward in this year (regardless of what my sister orchestrated). And I will do that, no matter what!