Dealing with the Fear

Thank you so much for the comments about this feeling of fear that I have….it meant the world to me. I loved Linda’s comment

“Courage is not the absence of fear–but the belief that something is more important than the fear.”

I have always felt that I am a courageous person. I think that is why I am struggling at the moment. In effect, I am not used to feeling fear therefore I am lost. I want to talk to someone and thinking of going to see my doctor. If I am honest I think this fear is linked to the fear of failure and going to the doctor is almost a further sign that I am failing!! Does that make sense?

I am so tearful, the slightest comment makes the tears well up inside. Yesterday, I even filled up when I saw an advert for washing up liquid! I forced myself to meet a friend for lunch yesterday…I didn’t want to but I knew it was so important to get myself out. Whilst I was out it felt better but then when I got home to the silence….then I went straight back to this feeling of emptiness. 

I know I should go and talk to the Doctor and I am hoping by writing this down on this blog and admitting my feelings to the world…then I will find that courage deep inside to  reach out for help. 

I suppose it comes down to making that first step?

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