Forgiving Yourself a Remedy for a Broken Heart

I still wish that somebody would find a remedy for the aching heart, when I spoke to my Auntie she gave me a wonderful piece of relationship advice. She said “To help overcome the pain of a lost relationship, you must forgive yourself”

At first, I didn’t understand forgive myself, his death was not something I could control? Then I thought a little harder and realised that I did need to forgive myself. My mind was saying many sentences that started “If only…..” If only I hadn’t complained about moving, if only I had taken a days holiday, if only I had been there, I am sure you know what it is like!

The fact is I didn’t know that he would not come home, we had shared a wonderful life – yes, there were things that I regretted or petty arguments that were silly….but I had no way of knowing that he would die. We cannot change the past we can only use those experiences to change the future. I had nothing to forgive myself for, I could not have known. I could not have done anything more. Would he want me to hurt, no. Would he want me to my thoughts from If only, to thanks for the wonderful memories…of course.