Help for someone who does not feel grief?
April 6, 2007 by Anna Farmery
Filed under Grief
Over at google groups someone has posted
“I wonder if anyone here has had experience with the death of a family
member from whom you were totally estranged (by choice)? My brother
recently died from the cumulative effects of 25 years of unremitting
drug/alcohol abuse. During that quarter of a century span, he stole
from many people, took advantage of well-meaning relatives who tried
to help him, did time in jail, lied pathologically about everything,
caused untold grief to my parents (sometimes really terrorizing them)
etc etc. He basically dropped out of sight but by the time that
happened I had long since cut him out of my life. I only saw him once
in the last 10 years. So, now he has died in his mid-40s,
and in just about the way I predicted as long as 20 years ago.
The cold hard truth is, I don’t feel very much grief…..
I wonder if anyone has had to deal with the death of
one that you had much less positive feelings for?”
Can this community help in terms of resources or from practical experience – it would be great to give some tips.
i kicked my husband out 2 1/2 years ago as he was an aloholic and i had to look after my kids aged 4 and nearly 1 at the time.He saw the kids for 1 year then stopped contact suddenly.i now know that he was very bad for the drink. i havent seen him for over a year and in august this year the police came to say that he had died by hanging himself in his house.even though i havent seen him for so long,i cannot stop thinking about him and cannot sleep for the fear of him appearring to me.why do they do this????????????