Love Letters That Made Me Cry
September 19, 2008 by Anna Farmery
Filed under Building Memorials
Mum showed me a box that she found whilst clearing out her loft. The box contained all the notes that Dad had written her whilst they were “courting”. They were even more special because Dad was dyslexic and the writing was poor and very hard to understand.
There was even the receipts of gifts that he had sent mum. One was for an emerald ring that he had hidden inside a pickled onion jar, with a note attached saying…”Just like you, I have a heart of gold”
Dad wasn’t the most obviously romantic person, yet the letters showed the undying love he had for 
mum.
We so often create memories and don’t value them as occur. Memories are emotional – they can hurt yet they can provide such love….this little box caused a few tears, yet that little box brought such joy.
[istockphoto]
I had a similar experience this weekend. And it was also my hubby’s birthday on Saturday, so it made it more poignant. I had saved so many greeting cards that he had given me over the years, including a few of the little cards that are included with floral arrangements. Trying to decide which ones to keep, I was going through them. One of the little cards read, “Remembering the day that both our hearts were saved.” (By way of explanation, I have an artificial heart valve and this was marking the anniversary of the surgery.) I had completely forgotten that he’d made sure to mark that day. His sweetness was sorely missed while I was reading that card. Trigger for tears, obviously – but good ones, remembering how thoughtful he was.
What a lovely idea and a wonderful anniversary. That made me smile, is everything alright with your heart now? I will think about you on Saturday, I take it is this Saturday coming – not the one just gone?
It must be the time of year for cleaning. I also was cleaning out drawers today. I found a birthday card that said “To the Woman I’d Marry All Over Again”. Needless to say, I shed a few tears. I also found a wooden heart Rick had carved one Valentines’ Day that said “I Love You”, These are the good things we have to keep and hold dear to our hearts.
When my Mom died I cleaned out her apartment. I found a letter from WW II that my father had written asking her father for her hand in marriage. I guess my grandfather had given it to my Mom for a keepsake. It touched my heart with its sincerity. The handwriting was beautiful and I am sure my Dad made sure he used his best penmanship. I will always treasure this.
Jessica, I am so glad you made it through the hurricane.
Strange that love letters and memories should be the topic of the day. I have been out in the garage cleaning and came across a crate in which I had saved all of our wedding plans from the beginning of our decision to marry just 2 years ago. There are reciepts from the bridal shop and caterer, our notes from pre-marriage counseling, the outline and ideas for our vows to one another, our decision to say “As long as we both shall live” instead of “till death do us part”,pictures of us kissing, writings and ideas for our invitations and it is all so beautiful and painful. I can hardly see to write this from the tears in my eyes. Its strange because on some days I can feel almost cutoff from it all and charging about my days to fill up the emptiness; then POW it hits hard and it hurts as though it just happened. Still it helps to know others have walked this way and have survived. Thanks again, Judy
Greg’s birthday was Sept. 20th. I was fortunate that this day was also the scheduled dinner for the Houston Widow/Widowers group, and by complete coincidence, I was seated next to a woman – lost her spouse about a month before this – whose husband’s birthday was the SAME DAY as mine. Hers would have been 59, mine 57.
In answer: Anna, my heart is okay. I will eventually have to have this valve replaced, and it will be my first major surgery without my sweet hubby’s support. It has been a rather weepy time for me, recently. I think the stress of preparing, then fixing after the hurricane, had delayed some of this. Now I have had tearful times at work and at home. I know this is just another cycle, and I don’t want to wallow in it. But I do so miss him.
Oh this is so strange with us all experiencing different and yet so similar events! Don’t you just think it is wonderful that we have those memories but also that we can share them together…
Jessica don’t you worry about that weepy time…that is just a little bit of pain overflow leaving your heart as my Nana would say! And don’t you believe you are alone for your next surgery – we are all here for you:)
Dear Jessica,
Go ahead and wallow! You deserve to do it. It’s part of the healing process. You are a strong woman, and I’m sure that the wallowing won’t go on forever. It’s okay to do it now. Cry when you need to. Accept support from the family and friends who love you. Know that your friends at Widow’s Quest are sending you love across the globe.
Dear Judy,
My heart goes out to you. Your pain sounds like it is very fresh. What a sisterhood we belong to! I hope that you come here often, so you may feel the support from Anna and the rest of us who are walking beside you.
Hugs to you both,
Mary