Planning for the Future – Part 2
June 25, 2009 by Anna Farmery
Filed under Grief
Yesterday I posted about how to start moving forward through grief by giving ourselves some targets. It was great to see that is helped Leslie – a major contributor to this community, but I thought I would now add how I make sure that the words don’t stay on a piece of paper – how I “try” and put them into action each day.
- I put my goals on post it notes and spread them around the house - the bathroom mirror, the fridge door etc. This means that the dreams are constantly in my eye line and that they help me to stay positive.
- I put my legacy as my screensaver on my PC.
- I have put my goals into my diary….I have spread them throughout the year.
- Near to the goals I have put photo’s up which show me happy, laughing. I have deliberately chosen photos which are just me….to remind me of the feeling of being happy.
- I have asked my best friend to email me regularly to ask me how I am doing against the goals. I think the fact that I have shared them means that they are more real.
Bereavement is hard, and we have to find ways of replacing the depression with happy thoughts…this is how I do it….do any of you do anything similar?
I journal…via email & blogging…to process grief over losing my precious 31-year-old daughter-in-law Briana to metastatic breast cancer (October 2008). I was her day-time caregiver here in our home, while her husband, my oldest son, worked.
“Beets Are The Color of Love” http://figswithbri.com/?p=146
My post written right after she died.
“It’s Been 6-months Today…” http://figswithbri.com/?p=158
My post at the half year mark.
I still appreciate having photos of Bri around to remember her enthusiasm for life, her great smile, how she adored my son….wish I had made recordings of her voice and had taken more photos in the last six months.
I also am continuing to educate myself on cancer healing protocols, so perhaps I can be of help to someone else struggling with such a challenge by sharing what I learn.
My heart goes out to you, Anna. Take care. Grief’s a process.
Cynthe – I love your idea of continuing to learn and pass on your idea (and love) to others….wonderful. We can never bring them back but we can make sure that their death helps others..my thoughts are with you xx