Someone was talking today and saying how brave I was, I know that the lady meant it as a compliment and I thanked her for that….however, I then started to think about being brave?Isn’t brave when you know the risk and still find the courage to do it? When you suffer a bereavement you don’t choose that, in fact courage is in quite short supply in my experience at the point of losing the person you love.I came to the conclusion that widows and widowers need to dig deep and find the courage to face the world, to not give in …read more

Lizan left this comment to Loneliness – Even in a Crowd
“I sometimes feel absolutely deadly lonely, particularly when facing the weekend. I am so totally alone, it’s painful to think about…….. I am convinced it was meant to be” 
 I think we can all relate in one way to that feeling, when you are going through the grief process. I know I have often felt, was I born to be lonely? I believe though that human beings are born to love, that the ability to feel, the ability to love is what separates us from other species or even machinery! Loneliness takes …read more

I often think that you cannot bring any sense to the feeling of grief. After all I have found myself saying things like “why does it happen to all the good people?” But the more I do think about it there is sense, unfortunately it is the sense that we cannot come to terms with, it is the reality that we struggle with…
S = So we love and part – at some stage. We do know that it is not forever, maybe we would all be better thinking about how to make the most of our time together rather than …read more

Have you noticed how the small things can really affect you on a daily basis? I am learning to cope with the loss of a partner, a friend – that coping is better on some days rather than others but in general I am slowly coming to terms with it. When I get thrown it is over the smallest things, for instance little jobs around the house or tasks that I would never have done…  
One thing that I have done is to change the way that I approach the task..for instance, I have never been a decorator. I would …read more

The more I see of nature, the more I think of the similarity to our human life, feelings and being in love. When I think of how I have loved, I think of the seasons of grief…
 Spring = Love blossoms from a seed of friendship or attraction….it is fresh, uplifting and has a sense of total newness. Your days are bright, your days are full of energy…full of hope
 Summer = Love is warm, it burns your soul….you want it to last forever and the heat of the passion starts to be replaced by a deeper friendship….you feel that your love …read more

I am sometimes shocked by how people react to loss in their lives, I remember my mum laughing and   joking and talking about what we should do at the weekend. I remember that I just wanted to sit quietly with Dad, yet my sister couldn’t bare the pain and was inconsolable.
Maybe that is a sign of modern life that we rush to judge people, when in reality we handle grief differently. People can comfort, they can advise but YOU know in YOUR heart what you need…”good grief” is what is good for your soul and your sanity.