One reason that I am asking for entries for a Carnival on Sunday on how to turn your life around, is to highlight that as time goes by, the people around you may start to forget your pain. But that pain never goes away, it eases of course but the feeling of losing someone special NEVER goes away. What we do is learn to cope.
My friends have the date of the anniversary in their diary and we all get together to celebrate his life. Making a note of other people’s days is important so that you can acknowledge their pain and support them through. Maybe a …read more

I was speaking to someone today who had been disappointed by how people fall away after the initial mourning. She said a wonderful phrase that I thought I would share with you…
 ”People offer help, friends deliver it”
Friendship is a wonderful gift and the love of my friends will remain one of the key memories of a difficult time.

I want to write mission for this blog – a summary of how I want people to act and feel when they read it.
The reason for the blog from my point of view is to show that there are people who understand your grief, your emotions. That there is someone who cares that you do get through this time in your life. Also, ideas and tips that have either worked for me at pulling me through the persoanl crisis, or for friends and family. Somewhere you can come and know that people understand, and hopefully help support you.
I was thinking …read more

Wow, yesterday I asked for your support with a blog carnival this Sunday to act as a way of turning my grief into a positive memory. You have all been fantastic, and I look forward to receiving all the links. Please pass on to anyone you know who may want to contribute – a carnival of sharing and helping others!
 I chose the title of Turning your life around as he was one of the most positive people I have ever known, he always saw the positive in everything. When I honour his memory, I wanted to do something that would …read more

We understand how it feels to not get the chance to say what we really feel. I came across this poem by Stephanie Ineson that brought this home, and show how important it is not to have any regrets. Hope you like it.
Tomorrow – I’ll tell him just what he means,                                                                                                             That living and loving with him is in my dreams                                                                                              Tomorrow – I’ll give a big hug to mum,                                                                                                                    Say a quick thank you for all that she’s done.                                                                                                                                                                       Tomorrow- I’ll call or even drop by, I’ll say “I love you” state all the reasons why.
Tomorrow-I’ll go about getting in touch                                                                                                                    With …read more

One of the great aspects of blogging is that there is a huge amount of support forums on line. B5 media always give you the impression that you are not on your own. That is a great feeling when you are feeling low.
This made me think of how you could develop your own support group for others. This could be on line, second life or in your community. We are absolutly not on our own, there are many people who are all feeling the pain of having loved and lost. So if you want to do something positive…why not set …read more

What is strange is that when a “crisis” happens in your life, this can lead to greater clarity. I don’t know if you are the same but when you suffer loss, you start to think about what you really want out of life. Suddenly, life seems short to be unhappy?
That happened to me and the losing of someone you love can have a positive side effect of getting you to really think about what you want from life. For me, it caused me to rethink my career as I had not been happy for a while – I loved the …read more

So here is the definition of a quest
Quest = “a long and difficult search”
I think that is a great summary of what we all go through. I don’t know about you but at the beginning I didn’t even know what I was searching for, or indeed if I wanted to search! This is my experience
I don’t want to search
I can’t ever see myself wanting to
I don’t want to feel this way
How do I get through this?
I need to get through it for my family
I think I can get through it – a day at a time
At this point you are …read more

When you lose someone it brings home your own mortality, and it has made me think about how I want people to think about me when I die.
On my other blog for business The Engaging Brand I interviewed Rob Galford who has just written a book about living your legacy and one of his comments really hit home with me.
“Every day you leave a legacy” and that is true. Every day we leave our own history on the world, and how we behave is in a small way creating our legacy by which others will remember us.
After losing someone who left …read more

I want to share a story with you…..a friend who I will call Jean lost her beloved husband. Jean was quite a talker, but had never been out socially without her husband. She lived for 15 months waiting for people to call at her house, as she grew more and more fearful of social gatherings.
One day a long term friend arrived and said “I am just on my way shopping would you like to come?”…after trying to find reasons of why not she eventually gave in. To cut a long story short that day she met a neighbour in town who …read more