“your life’s footprint’s will not be washed away by the tide of grief”

When our loved ones leave us sometimes I think that we hold on to the memories as tight as we can because we fear if we let go then somehow

• We are doing something wrong
• We may forget them
• Others may forget them

On those days when you feel guilty or you feel fear then remember what I said at Nana’s funeral. They may be gone from our everyday lives but we will NEVER, NEVER forget them from our hearts.

Post from: Widows Quest

Cheryl Ragsdale presents Faith, a Two-Legged Dog, Walks Upright Like a Human posted at That Girl is Funny, saying, ” Faith shows every day the strength and wonder of life – and that the things you never thought could happen – will one day become a reality.”

Vincent presents Rocky Balboa’s Lessons On Life posted at Hit Your Goals.

Kaushik Chokshi presents Saying Aloha to Fear posted at Beyond Karma, saying, “Positivity does not come from positive thinking. It is already here in abundance when fear is let go of.”

Positive Present presents are the people in your life positive? posted at positively present.

christopher foster presents How quickly an intention can manifest posted at thehappyseeker.com.

presents The Driving Force of Tremendous Change posted at The Real Mind, saying, “My guide to finding your root motivation for obtaining positive change.”

Elisha Webster Emerson presents A Little Angst Cannot be Helped posted at My Inconvenient Body, saying, “Angst may be a viable emotion, but here are some ways to keep it in check.”

Danea Horn presents Turning Negatives Into Positives posted at Affirmation Blog.

Michael Hogg presents Personal Goal Setting posted at michaelhogg.org.

Albie presents I find that, above all, the soul wants stories. posted at iDevelopWorld.

Joshua VanKirk presents How to stay positive posted at Your life. Your zen.

Anna presents Has the world changed really? posted at The Engaging Brand

Aparna presents Develop a positive attitude posted at Beauty and Personality Grooming, saying, “A positive attitude or outlook on life can lead to positive behavior and success. A person with a positive behavior draws others’ like a magnet.”

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of positive thinking using our carnival submission form.

Post from: Widows Quest

I remember after about 3 months getting so mad that he wasn’t replying or coming through to the lounge when I needed some help to move the television! I had no idea that he had died, to me at that moment he was alive and even annoying (!) as he was ignoring my shouts….

I wonder why these events happen but then I suppose it is down to

• The fact you have shared your life with this special person and in that sense your hearts have almost morphed into one then their presence or your relationship with them has been as much on the sub conscious level as conscious. As it is sub conscious then it will take time for your mind to accept the physical, conscious reality?
• Habit - sounds boring but when you live with someone habits form, your life becomes habitual. Again those habits have to be replaced with new customs.
• Our desire that they are alive, or our denial that they have died is also strong. We hide away from the pain. We don’t want to believe we will never see them again…so we bring them back into our lives, for that moments respite from the pain.

When it first happened I was scared, I had to ask a friend to come round to stay. Now though, I understand that I am not going mad, that there is nothing to fear….it is just natural emotion which can occur during grief.

For me I handle it by putting on that old jumper and getting some photos out….having a few tears while talking to him. He always understands and makes me smile…..I can always hear him say…”you don’t even give me time to rest even when I have died….”

Do you have any other thoughts on why it happens?

Post from: Widows Quest

Well a wise old lady once said to me “When you can’t believe in yourself Anna, believe in something bigger than yourself and happiness will follow”

I think this is an important concept. I think so often we can become insular and become too inward looking. That sounds harsh, and maybe that was just me! However, I seemed to obsess about my pain, about my fears, about not sleeping, about my heartache…one way through is to look past those feelings and find something larger than you to concentrate on…for me it was how could I give something back to the world, how could I stop others from feeling alone.

Looking at the world, looking at how you can help change the world a little bit can help you focus away from the pain and towards ideas that will feed that happiness seed within your soul.

Post from: Widows Quest

• Love makes you lose control with giddiness
• Love can cause fear…fear of losing your love
• Love causes pain when they are taken from you

Love is comforting, love is precious and yet it makes me wonder why something so wonderful can never be enjoyed without pain. So would I say it was worth it…would I want to have felt love if I had realised the danger….

…YES.

Post from: Widows Quest

Or am I?

After I came off the call, I thought do others expect me to be strong in grief and help them cope with bereavement or do I?

You know when I think about it…and if I am being completely honest!….I think it comes from me. No one has ever said you need to be strong, I have expected it of myself because of those grieving around me. I have not wanted to be seen as weak and yet I have never seen those as grieving around me as weak!

You know it may be more to do with not letting that emotion really flow…it might be about the fear that if I let myself grieve unconditionally that I will crumble…..I think I am strong in some ways more for me than other people? I think I fear being weak, more than anyone else does? And when I think about it, my ’strength’ has often caused a problem with those around me because they feel I should be grieving more or that it has made them feel more inadequate.

Mmmm who are we being strong for really…..maybe it is for other people but maybe there is a small element for ourselves as well

[istockphoto]

Post from: Widows Quest

• Writing my concerns down in the blog post helped me face the problems.
• Sharing the problem somehow released the fear of the problem.
• Realizing that there was only me…..there was only me that could believe that I could cope. I stopped looking for someone else, and started to look inside my heart for the courage to face the struggle.
• I set an action list breaking down the “out-of-controlness” into small achievable tasks. Then prioritized them, then started down the list…ticking them off as I went….gosh that felt great.

From believer to achiever in 4 easy steps!

Now we must find the trick of keeping this sane approach to life in our brains….because in a week I will be frantic again!

Why as humans can we not learn how to keep believing in ourselves no matter the situation?

Post from: Widows Quest

Grief changes you, but is that necessarily a bad thing? I have learned what loss is like and that has altered the way that I relate to people. I am more grateful, I am more empathetic to people’s needs. I am now more grateful for what I have in life and also grateful for the love that I have felt along the way and in that way I think I am a better person.

Grief changes you but is that necessarily a good thing? I have learned that I fear more which can prevent me from moving on, it can prevent me from doing things, it can prevent me from finding happiness. I struggle to let the past go and struggle to let the guilt melt away.

Grief changes you but it is up to us to decide how…..grief affects you in different ways both good and bad. If we are to learn from bereavement then we have to let go of the bad and embrace the good…in that way we help the world become a better place.

Post from: Widows Quest

After saying that I have suffered from fear much of my life and if I have learned one it is to embrace fear. Fear means that you are living, fear creates the excitement in your life if you befriend it rather than hate it.

In 2009 I believe we should all resolve to face our fear, to use that fear to live again.

[istockphoto]

Post from: Widows Quest

HighGrace presents Your next 30 years — Face to the Sun posted at Face to the Sun.

Akemi presents What I Know About Life And Death posted at Yes to Me.

Relax presents How to Become a Sleeping Winner posted at The Wise Curve, saying, “Get good quality sleep with Progressive Muscle Relaxation, and proper matress + pillows.”

Chris Edgar presents Calling A Truce In The “War Of Words” posted at Purpose Power Coaching, saying, “Many people seem to harbor the unconscious fear that, if they don’t have a quick and witty enough reply when someone criticizes them, they’re going to be physically injured or die. How do we overcome this fear and regain a sense of composure and control in our interactions? In this article, I describe three approaches I’ve used myself and in working with others.”

ananga presents How to Control Anxiety with Grounding Techniques posted at Ananga’s Living by Design Blog.

Naren Ghimire presents 5 Ways to Stop Complaining and Criticizing Unnecessarily posted at Spiritual Pub, saying, “This article will delve into the psychology behind complaining and criticizing unnecessarily and offer 5 key solutions to stop doing so.”

c.camino presents Scientist Confirm the Power of Happy! posted at Spirit Happy, saying, “Science are recognizing the power of happiness and positivity in clinical studies.”

Sarah Scrafford presents 100 Natural Ways to Overcome Anxiety posted at U.S. PharmD.

omguy presents The Butterfly Effect posted at Ordinary Miracles, saying, “A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours. . .”

Rahul Bhambhani presents How to Deal with Criticism posted at Personal Development Advice, Tools to Improve the Quality of your Life, saying, “Whenever you decide to go against the grain and strive to reach some of your loftier goals, you can bet you’re going to come up against a considerable amount of criticism. For you to succeed in reaching these goals, you must learn to deal with this criticism in a healthy and positive way.”

Shamelle presents Are You Constantly At The Mercy Of Circumstances? posted at Enhance Life.

Stephen Martile presents How to Jump Start Your Day posted at FreedomEducation.ca by Stephen Martile, saying, “Have you ever noticed how important it is to have a solid start to your day? This morning I started this article and I woke up feeling full of energy. Deep down I knew that today was going to be an awesome day. I’m sure you’ve had days like that too.”

Robert Logan presents Believe posted at Emphasizing the positive. Minimizing the negative..

Peter Murphy presents Easy Conversation Starters Anyone Can Use At Work posted at Communication Skills Power.

ChristianPF presents Stewardship – What is it really? posted at Money in the Bible | Christian Personal Finance Blog, saying, “A look at our roles as stewards and how to be a “good steward”"

Donald Latumahina presents Keys to Success from The Dip posted at Life Optimizer.

David B Bohl presents 6 Signs Your Perfectionism Might be Veering into Control Freak Territory posted at Slow Down Fast Today!, saying, “Are you constantly redoing things to make sure they’re absolutely perfect? Do you find yourself noticing pictures on walls that are slightly crooked and straightening them, even if it’s not in your own home? Are you consistently late and always have a pat excuse? Do you criticize and find faults with others, but in your mind, you’re always right?”

Jeff Carlson presents Are bagels healthy to eat in the morning? posted at Gobs Channel, saying, “Bagels and healthiness. Are they really the best thing to eat in the morning?”

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of positive thinking using our
carnival submission form.

Post from: Widows Quest