Last week I had the pleasure of going to Whitby the place which was so special in my Dad’s heart and where my mum still has a home. On the cliff top, Mum placed a seat as a lasting memorial to Dad. It is just outside Mums house and provides such comfort to us all.
It is strange, it is just a seat. A seat that Dad has never sat on and yet his spirit is there…he loved looking out to sea, he loved watching the world go by….
On the Sunday I was walking back from the town and I looked …read more

The music at a funeral can be very emotive and I know how important it is to choose the right song. We had a question

earlier this week about songs which are suitable for childrens funerals. I found a website that suggests
Funeral Songs and Memorial Music for a Child’s Service

My Heart Will Go On – performed by Celine Dion (Sample lyrics – “Every night in my dreams I see you, I feel you, that is how I know you go on”
In Dreams – performed by Roy Orbison (Sample lyrics – “In dreams I walk with you. in dreams I talk …read more

Over the weekend I got a call from a family friend who told me that her mother had just died. Lucy was one of the special people in this world and I blogged about the effect she had on my life over at The Engaging Brand – here is what I wrote almost 3 years ago
“While there, we visited one of our family friends…Lucy. Lucy is amazing – 93, immaculately dressed, lives 6 months a year by herself in a caravan on the cliffs at Whitby, and never, ever stops smiling. She loves life and is living proof that a …read more

I came across iLasting which is a memorial site which the founder Anthony Doctolero said “I created the site because I wanted to pay tribute to my grandfather who was a special person in my life. He was an ordinary man, who led an extraordinary life. He was not a celebrity, but to our family he was the president….This site is not about death; it’s about celebrating life.
I was intrigued by his story and asked if he could write some tips for us on how to create a memorial, he was good enough to send me these thoughts
1. Include basic …read more

As time goes by from the death the memories I find become more and more intangible. One thing I have found is that if you can keep those memories alive, if you can keep those memories part of your life then it helps.
I have found that doing two things have helped me. I helped build a memorial in a garden, one that people could enjoy and reflected his life. For my dad I started blogging and podcasting about his ideas.
Somehow this kept the memories alive, it created a sense that they were still here helping the world as they would …read more

Holiday periods are for me the worst time of the year. Worse than anniversaries, worse than birthdays. I think it is because the holiday season is too many one of the happiest family times, and the gap becomes even more evident than normal. Also all the traditions that you did together, come back to you…
I believe that the best way to cope with the holiday season is to prepare ahead of time. Here are some things that I do but would love you all to share how you prepare…maybe we can find a best practice?

I still buy presents for the …read more

I am posting a day late as yesterday we held a memorial for my late father which was a special event. I will write about that later. Dad was a loving man who saw the good in everyone – I remember him saying “What do you mean is the milk bottle half full or half empty….you mean there is a gap?” which summed him up and he would love a blog carnival that helps us see through the pain of grief and see the positive in the future. So Dad here are this weeks articles

Colin presents Developing A Positive Attitude …read more

Grief affects us all in different ways. I was intrigued by this article at Buffalo News which highlights memorials people have created to remember their loved ones. Here are some examples

A Metro Bus rumbles down Delaware Avenue in downtown Buffalo, displaying a full-color portrait of the late Tim Russert, former NBC News Washington bureau chief.

Two years after a Buffalo nun’s violent death, thousands of people who never knew her still have “I Leave Peaceprints” signs sprouting from their front lawns in memory of the legacy of Sister Karen Klimczak.

Millions who watched a Super Bowl halftime show in 2002 …read more

Sandra from Families Against Crime  left a comment to PS I Love You giving the back story of the book that I talked about and explaining how this book of poetry, dedicated to all those we have lost to a violent crime…. came to being.She also left a link to a tribute website for Matthew Martins which again is a wonderful way of expressing your feelings and building a memorial to our lost loved ones. This is part of what she says
“This is for all those who have lost a child, mother, father, brother, or sister due to a …read more

I was speaking to someone this week who was unsure about whether to buy a gravestone. It made me think about how we remember people. My friend’s issue was that a gravestone seemed cold, seemed bleak and I can understand her feelings.
I actually chose to plant a tree and flowers as for me, this was more about celebrating the life. Almost as one life dies, another begins
What are your thoughts? Do you favour more of a memorial, or do you like the tradition of the gravestone?
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