Last week I had the pleasure of going to Whitby the place which was so special in my Dad’s heart and where my mum still has a home. On the cliff top, Mum placed a seat as a lasting memorial to Dad. It is just outside Mums house and provides such comfort to us all.
It is strange, it is just a seat. A seat that Dad has never sat on and yet his spirit is there…he loved looking out to sea, he loved watching the world go by….
On the Sunday I was walking back from the town and I looked …read more

I often write how walking has helped me with my grief. Just being with nature helps, achieving the goal each day helps, the air on my face helps and also I meet people whilst I am out walking…
But I have just read this article that your Memory is Improved by 20% by Walking. Now I am not sure that some parts of my memory I want back….you know the ones that I mean – the pain, the loss etc but in terms of our future life then walking is a great health protector. It says that the study
“The results showed …read more

As time goes by from the death the memories I find become more and more intangible. One thing I have found is that if you can keep those memories alive, if you can keep those memories part of your life then it helps.
I have found that doing two things have helped me. I helped build a memorial in a garden, one that people could enjoy and reflected his life. For my dad I started blogging and podcasting about his ideas.
Somehow this kept the memories alive, it created a sense that they were still here helping the world as they would …read more

From the love that made you who you are….
From the desire to keep their memory alive….
From knowing that nothing, absolutely nothing, will bring them back..
From knowing that life is too precious to give away….
From seeing the pain of those around you, who want you to come through the pain….
From a life history of knowing that things will “look better in the morning!”
From focuing on what you can do rather than what you can’t change…
From knowing that they would want you to find a happiness….
From deep inside, from that personality that made them love you….
From knowing that giving up will feel …read more

Broken hearts are fragile, they have scars just like the cracks in a broken vase. When that vase breaks you can put it back together, you can glue the pieces…there will always be a thin crack that is visible to the world. However, that vase can still be beautiful, can still be precious. You learn to turn the vase so that people don’t see the break.
Broken hearts are just the same. There will always be the memory, however you can put your heart back together, through the glue of family, friends and a little self belief. A broken heart doesn’t …read more

Yesterday I wrote about What is the Meaning of Life? Today I am thinking that hope is such an important of finding that happiness in life
H= Having life goals that you strive for
O= Owning the thought that you are in control of your life and that you can define your own happiness
P= Putting an emphasis on the future. The past is memory and makes you who you are, the future is yours to create.
E= Expectations that are realistic and yet stretching. I think sometimes we can expect too much or even not enough. Getting the   balance is important in …read more

I posted a while ago about Watching Someone Die and Gloria just posted a comment that touched my heart, the comment ended
“The one thing I walk away with is the knowledge that he was a great man, an unbelievable father and an undying love and trust for God. He will help me through this.”
It touched me because I still remember the last moments of my Dad’s life, I still   remember feeling guilty of waiting for him to go…he was in such pain and I didn’t want that for him, I wanted him to be at peace. I loved him …read more