Widows Quest » valentines-day

Happy Valentine’s Day – Here’s to Love!

Anna Farmery — Sat, 14 Feb 2009 17:16:04 +0000

Last week I posted some tips on how to handle your grief on Valentines Day, so I hope that you are facing today with some strength, a dose of courage and of course knowing that a hug from me is on its way

I was thinking how I could cope with Valentines Day and decided I would face it positively so here are my 10 “grieving” love thoughts

I love the fact we were together
I love the person you helped me become
I love the way I wear your jumper today and know you are still around me
I love the fact that I got to feel real love
I love the fact that we faced the world together, no matter what life threw at us we coped – we even laughed
I love the way people speak about you, even now. You still touch peoples lives.
I love the fact that I can help keep your legacy alive, you may not be here but your legacy of compassion and giving carries on.
I love the fact that I can still hear your laugh, that laugh that was so infectious and even now makes me smile
I love the fact that we worked through our problems, that we were not perfect, that we never gave up our love. By working through our personal feelings we became stronger.
I love the fact that I can still feel your love deep in my heart…….I love you too

I don’t want today to be about loss, I want it to be about love……..because in love you can usually find an answer….

Post from: Widows Quest

Preparing for Valentines Day Alone

Anna Farmery — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 12:24:45 +0000

One thing I love about the Widows Quest community is the willingness to share our grief and tips on how to cope with bereavement. Here are quick tips on how to deal with grief and start the recovery during the Valentine’s Day from Louise Zweben, CEO of SympathyTree.com It is only a week away and I hope these tips on coping with grief will help us all. Feel free in the comments to add your own…
Create an online memorial that brings your family and friends together from all over the world to share stories of love and loss, sadness and joy, written in words, photos and video about the person you lost; to help us smile, laugh, cry and embrace our loved one’s life in an effort to make sense of our loss. While allowing you to create a very nice tribute to them on this special day, online memorial also provides the comfort of a close community and allows us to take the first steps needed to move forward.
Collect photographs and watch videos of you with your loved one as a way to remember the times you shared with them. You do not want to just block it out. Moving on starts with looking back.
Invite friends or family over to share a meal or some time together. Time spent with them can be a very cathartic and reflective time and begins the process of putting things in perspective.
Start the process of getting your business matters in order so you can begin to bring some normalcy back in your life. This involves getting in order the tax records, property records, investment records, insurance and retiree benefit records, as well as addressing trivial issues such as getting utility bills, bank accounts and credit cards in your name. Working with close family members or an attorney is the right way to start. Don’t postpone them for too long., start something small on this Valentine’s Day.
Pledge to join a support group, so you can learn to cope with the loss of someone who was a part of what made us what we are. So, what do we do, how do we go on after they are gone and how do we deal with the grief? In addition to family and friends, a support group can help you during this difficult time.
Visit their grave, so you can tell them how much you loved them and miss them. Say things you forgot to say when you were together, as if they are standing right in front of you. You may be carrying burdens of guilt, which unless released, will come in the way of your moving forward. Start unleashing those burdens this Valentine’s Day.

Post from: Widows Quest

Valentine Days – The Feeling of Loneliness

Anna Farmery — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 09:47:56 +0000

Today is one of those days..if you are reading this blog you know what I mean….a day when you feel alone, lost, low on energy to pick yourself up to face the world. Yes, you see for all my positive writing it happens to me!

This feeling is awful, and I feel OK thinking like this because I have learned to trust myself to come through it…so today I will allow myself to feel down. Tomorrow I will write down a couple of action points that I will achieve over the coming days to kick start my life again.

For today, I will feel alone, I will feel down, I will feel that I just don’t want to see anyone. Today I will struggle to understand that anyone else can feel like this, I will struggle to see what is the point…..Days like today are just a sign that I am still struggling on the journey through grief. No matter, I am not mad – I am just human!

Would love to hear your thoughts on how you cope with these days and is it just Valentine Day blues?

Post from: Widows Quest

Bringing a Smile for Valentines Day

Anna Farmery — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 09:47:55 +0000

In celebration of the upcoming holiday, the b5media Lifestyles Channel participated in their own little carnival, hearts and flowers, hugs and kisses…

I wanted to share the wonderful posts as a way of helping us see that Valentines Day may be difficult to us but yet there is still love in the world, there is still love there for us all to find…when we are ready…

Now, won’t take a little stroll with me around the channel to revisit some and discover new Valentine goodies our bloggers are dishing up just for you?

Cyndi from Layers Upon Layers shares a beautiful handcrafted plaque that packs a punch and if you’re not into throwing a punch, how about jewelry. That’s always a nice option – especially when it’s handmade.

Widows Quest offers tips to help cope during the holiday or anniversary when the loss of a loved one might feel a bit more difficult.

Katelyn at Stamping Mad has created a special Valentine’s Greeting especially for her readers.

Sandy at All Holiday Cafe pauses to thank her 6th Grade English Teacher for giving her the love of words.

Christina from SoloMother pays tribute to all those who have enriched the lives of both she and her son, made them laugh, made them feel safe, loved, wanted.

Deb Ng shares a funny little poem she’s written for her husband and his amazing and a little more than Simply Thrifty habits.

Hankering for Yarn and Noreen is sharing a family tradition this holiday by sharing a design and tips on how to make a spool knitted Valentine.

Chloe from Tangled Thread has decided to give felt sweethearts this year for Valentine’s Day, not candy ones.

Marcie at A Child Chosen has a delightful idea for a candy-free alternative to creating a fun Valentine for kids.

Peggy, one of our newest channel members has created a very special Valentine to our planet Earth via Tree Hugging Family.

Julie from Declutter It is thinking of her husband on Valentine’s Day with a funny little poem that could be from the spouse of anyone who spends too much time on the computer. And if you swing on over to Play Library, you can check out some very funny Valentine quotes that are sure to bring a smile to your face.

If a romantic comedy is what you have in mind this Valentine’s Day, check out the list of movie titles Thrifty Mommy has compiled and while you’re there, why not drop off a few of your own favorite titles too!

If you’re parenting teens or tweens, be sure to check out the list of Valentine activities for kids of all ages at Weary Parent. You’ll find a fun assortment of treats, crafts and more that Char has graciously put together.

Farley shares a somewhat intimate letter to the object of her blogging affection on Behind the Vines.

Joshua at Junk Creations has come up with an amazing, recycled style Valentine for his lovely bride and is sharing his creativeness with all of us. I wonder if his wife knows how much we appreciate his artistic talents?

The newest edition to Supernanny Rules pays tribute to her husband with a quirky little poem that is tells it like it is.

Heather has taken her Creative Journal and used it as a space to share a Haiku from the heart for her own love this holiday of love.

Our very own Lifestyles channel Super Hero, Trench, has written a very special poem to the Attorney General at My Crime Space, while at Psycho for Love, he shares his views on why there should be an Anti-Valentine’s Day and shares his thoughts on how people should let those they love know they love them all year long.

Jennifer at Offbeat Homes has created a special offbeat Valentine greeting especially for her readers.

Mary Emma Allen at Quilting and Patchwork suggests seven ideas for Valentine’s Day cards, gifts, and activities quilters can use to make this a special occasion.

Heather at Chocolate Bytes has gotten clever in how to drop hints for her husband when it gets to be February 13th and he hasn’t got a clue what to get her.

Noel at Unplugged Living offers up a special greeting to his wife and son with a surprise announcement for his readers.

Marye at Baking Delights takes us along for a walk down memory lane to a time when she decorated her first cake ever. Speaking of memory lane, while you’re there, check out the flashback to our very own G.I. Jane and how she handles those who try to steal her thunder.

Sasha at Dating Dames shares her own Top 5 Heart Gifts. This list might come in handy for those who are stumped for ideas.

Maricar at Keeping the Castle has created a special card for all her readers. Cupids got nothing on our Queen of the Castle.

Kerri Aldrich of Marriage Actually was one who was down with the flu and since her Valentine took such good care of her while she was sick, she was inspired to write a bit of poetry.

Elizabeth, otherwise known to many as BusyMom, shares a special love note from her heart to her readers on both GenBetween and Career and Kids.

Linette Gerlach at Mother Earth’s Garden is getting prepared for Spring and has taken a bit of a break from gardening tips and tales to share a little Valentine poem and Herbal Folklore with all of you.

Christine Gooding, our virtual wedding planner shares lots of Valentine Wedding Proposal ideas for all you men folk who have the ring, but not the words.

And what better way to end our trail of Valentine wishes… Tracee Sioux of BlogFabulous is like having our very own Energizer Bunny sometimes. Tracee has put together her own little shopping list of thank yous to the love of her life…

I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentine’s Day holiday and if you can’t be with the one you love, share it with those who love you, right here on b5media Lifestyles.

Post from: Widows Quest

Preparing for a Lonely Valentine’s Day

Anna Farmery — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 11:15:57 +0000

When any holiday, anniversary or celebration comes around I like to prepare myself ahead of time, so that the pain of grief is eased. We are now just over a week a way from Valentine’s Day – so what am I doing to ensure that I cope despite that sense of missing the one I love.

I buy flowers, the flowers that I would have received and put them in the sitting room. Flowers always cheer me up, they remind me of wonderful memories and also they have such a lovely smell that makes me feel better.
I write a letter each year, go to our special place on the day and read it out. So I start writing it now and thinking about what I want to say and what I want to share about my personal progress.
I try and arrange going out with a friend on Valentines Day. Or I visit an older family member, just to ensure that I am not wallowing but showing my love to others…

Valentine’s also reminds me that love is such a wonderful emotion. I try and spend some time ensuring that I am not shutting my emotions down and that I feel that I can love again….I may not be ready but it is important to remind ourselves that finding love again is OK, that as human beings we are built to love….a new love will never mean forgetting, it will mean that I have come to terms with the right to be happy again…

Post from: Widows Quest

Valentine’s Day

Anna Farmery — Wed, 14 Feb 2007 21:19:22 +0000

This is a tough day for me, a day of love and knowing how much you miss them. I haven’t felt 100%, I have felt lacking in energy which no doubt is my heart needs some time. I understand that and I am not going to give myself a hard time for not being as productive as I could have been. I am a day dreamer and I spent a few minutes casting over the great memories. People say you can choose your attitude, well today I have tried hard. I have chosen not to think what I have lost through death but what I gained through his life on earth. He gave me strength, love, support, wonderfully happy memories that will last for eternity. The body may have gone but I feel the love as strong as ever, and for that I will be eternally grateful.

Post from: Widows Quest