Widows Quest » widows quest

Online Meeting for Widows and Widowers

Anna Farmery — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 16:55:06 +0000

As we have enjoyed meeting online for the last two months, I thought I would try and arrange a session for July. If you want to speak to other people who understand about grief, who will listen and share their tips on coping with bereavement…then why not sign up at our widows quest wiki. On the site are 3 suggested dates 2nd, 3rd or 4th July….let me know which one would work for you. We base it on 6pm New York time.

What do I get out of these sessions?

The feeling of belonging. That I am with people who just…well understand.
Happiness. People are so good at sharing stories and often such funny memories which make me laugh.
The feeling of not being alone. Listening to others show me that grief is like a roller coaster….that I am not weak, I am just grieving.

I do hope that you will join us….it is very informal and totally free!

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Widows Online Support Group

Anna Farmery — Sat, 09 May 2009 16:32:41 +0000

Widows Quest has become more than a blog it has become a community for friends who are coping with grief. If you feel low, or in need of speaking to people who understand bereavement then just register your name over at the Widows Quest wiki and I will send you the log in details. I have asked on the site about availability on 4th, 5th or 6th June…would be great to see you there.

It was wonderful to hear peoples voices for our first get together in May – for those of you who didn’t join in, all you need is a computer (a microphone is good so we can hear you but you can type or just listen if you would like), it really is wonderful talking and listening to other widows. For those of you wondering ….it is free!

Wonder if people would like to suggest a topic or whether people would like just to talk…..

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Who are we being strong for?

Anna Farmery — Tue, 05 May 2009 16:45:17 +0000

When we talked on our monthly Widows Quest telephone call in, we talked about how some of us were expected to be strong. I was one of those people, I am quite easy going, I tend to see the positive in dark times….and so when anyone dies around me I am expected to be strong….

Or am I?

After I came off the call, I thought do others expect me to be strong in grief and help them cope with bereavement or do I?

You know when I think about it…and if I am being completely honest!….I think it comes from me. No one has ever said you need to be strong, I have expected it of myself because of those grieving around me. I have not wanted to be seen as weak and yet I have never seen those as grieving around me as weak!

You know it may be more to do with not letting that emotion really flow…it might be about the fear that if I let myself grieve unconditionally that I will crumble…..I think I am strong in some ways more for me than other people? I think I fear being weak, more than anyone else does? And when I think about it, my ’strength’ has often caused a problem with those around me because they feel I should be grieving more or that it has made them feel more inadequate.

Mmmm who are we being strong for really…..maybe it is for other people but maybe there is a small element for ourselves as well

[istockphoto]

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An Ode for Friends at Widows Quest xx

Anna Farmery — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 20:50:39 +0000

There are days when the world seems black

When nothing seems right, when all hope is lost

Then I come here to our Widows community

And you my friends, hold my heart until it can beat once more

I fear, I grieve, I miss, I long, I struggle to breathe

Nothing will get me through this pain

Then I come here to our Widows Quest community

And you hold my heart until it can beat once more, on its own

I want you to know that you are my friends

My guiding lights from the dark tunnel of death

I want you to know dear friends that

Whenever your heart needs holding I am here too

We may have suffered loss, but in our grief we gain

We gain through friendships, we gain through shared pain

Pain that no one, other than us can truly understand

When people ask what is Widows Quest? I will now say

A place where your heart is held, until it can beat once more…on its own

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Thanksgiving from a Widow’s Perspective

Anna Farmery — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 20:47:58 +0000

To all my US friends I hope that this holiday season treats you well, I know that holidays are in so many ways tough for people in grief but here are 4 ways to give thanks

Give thanks to all those around you, whose love has kept you strong
Give thanks to to your heart for caring so much about you that it has kept beating despite all the pain.
Give thanks for our community at Widows Quest – there for all our bad days, to smile on the good days and most of all, to always listen and never judge.
Give thanks for the love that flows through your veins, that love is the one that will eventually win and help us see that there is light in this world when we are ready.

Maybe we can help make this a great holiday by us giving thanks to all those around us. We may want to think more about who is missing, but you know it may be the time to value the people who are living…..

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