The River of Grief
April 13, 2009 by Anna Farmery
Filed under Grief
Grief is like the meandering river that flows across the lands. Sometimes the gentle flow of memories, other times when the love and pain collide – the torrents of pain become emotional waves that simply cannot be controlled.
Grief is the river that is a continuous journey across one side of your life to another…
Grief is the river in which your earlier dreams and hopes flow to create the nightmares that engulf your life.
Grief is like cold water pain that shocks the warm feelings of love…..
Grief is the natural spring water that flows from giving your heart to the one you love…eventually….because eventually all love will part.
Grief - the river that no one wants to experience and yet the river that nature will always make us endure at some stage of our life
I found this site helpful for some time but lately it seems to be very facile and unfocused and with nothing that really makes me learn from my “widows; Quest”. I will not give up and will check in now and then.
I need a site that deals with my grief and fight for growth and contentment. All of the asides about positive thinking, success tips, on and on I have known about for many years but my loss of my spouse is a whole different type of challenge.
Wishing you the best. Cindy
Cindy
I am sorry if you feel that way, the site cannot be totally focused as it is a personal reflection of my journey through grief. Yours is the first comment that says it is unhelpful so I hope for many the site provides support. I hope that you do return and I hope also that you cope with your grief and find the support you need.
I wish you all the best
Annna, I’m sorry. I just have been overreacting to everything lately. The first year after Don died was a piece of cake compared to this year. I’ve been in bed with the flu, and alone, for over 10 days and now I am having lots of trouble with depression.
You are right – it’s focused when it is your own journey with grief and you have done a lot of good here. I know you will continue to do so.
Cindy
CIndy – you don’t need to apologise. We understand the anger, that feeling that reading this blog just doesn’t give you that answer to how to live with the pain….because it can’t the only one answer is allowing time to heal which none of us want to hear…..I hope you stay with our group and join in our first monthly telephone call
http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/support-group-at-widows-quest/#comment-3409
As the more we reach out, the more we will help each other
Anna xx
Cindy, I can identify with how you feel. We’re all at various stages of grief. Some people are newly bereaved and raw, others are further along the path, and then others think their grief is behind them until they get walloped by an unexpected tidal wave of emotion. I, too, thought that year 2 was a lot harder than year 1. Partially because everyone else (except the bereaved) is back to their normal lives. February 1 marked the beginning of year 3, and only now am I beginning to make changes in my physical environment: and only now am I contemplating the possibility of a new love coming into my life.
Hugs,
Mary
Feeling ‘out of control” did it for me I think. Not only was I ill and alone but with a large blended family of kids, step kids, grand kids, on and on and there have been different kinds of pressurized situations to deal with.
I was always a very energetic and proactive person before Don died of pancreatic cancer, but now I have to shepherd my energy in order to do all that I must do. When a handful of people, who haven’t lived it, tell me I should be Over It, I have learned to ignore it but I do want more for my aging, arthritic body and future no matter what. Our family is all over the country. I still want to make a real life for myself and for my own family too. And feel the old feelings of anticipation for life’s events for myself! Been a long time!
I do like this site and sorry my anger caught me blindsided the other night. I didn’t want to deal with change of any kind and the board format changed. For the better but it didn’t seem that way to me at the time. Well, we will see where I go and I am grateful for help and guidance. And wish all of you well too.