Comments on: The River of Grief http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/ Redefine Yourself and Rediscover Life after a Loss Tue, 22 Dec 2009 15:46:16 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Cindy http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3442 Cindy Mon, 27 Apr 2009 05:31:18 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3442 Feeling 'out of control" did it for me I think. Not only was I ill and alone but with a large blended family of kids, step kids, grand kids, on and on and there have been different kinds of pressurized situations to deal with. I was always a very energetic and proactive person before Don died of pancreatic cancer, but now I have to shepherd my energy in order to do all that I must do. When a handful of people, who haven't lived it, tell me I should be Over It, I have learned to ignore it but I do want more for my aging, arthritic body and future no matter what. Our family is all over the country. I still want to make a real life for myself and for my own family too. And feel the old feelings of anticipation for life's events for myself! Been a long time! I do like this site and sorry my anger caught me blindsided the other night. I didn't want to deal with change of any kind and the board format changed. For the better but it didn't seem that way to me at the time. Well, we will see where I go and I am grateful for help and guidance. And wish all of you well too. Feeling ‘out of control” did it for me I think. Not only was I ill and alone but with a large blended family of kids, step kids, grand kids, on and on and there have been different kinds of pressurized situations to deal with.

I was always a very energetic and proactive person before Don died of pancreatic cancer, but now I have to shepherd my energy in order to do all that I must do. When a handful of people, who haven’t lived it, tell me I should be Over It, I have learned to ignore it but I do want more for my aging, arthritic body and future no matter what. Our family is all over the country. I still want to make a real life for myself and for my own family too. And feel the old feelings of anticipation for life’s events for myself! Been a long time!

I do like this site and sorry my anger caught me blindsided the other night. I didn’t want to deal with change of any kind and the board format changed. For the better but it didn’t seem that way to me at the time. Well, we will see where I go and I am grateful for help and guidance. And wish all of you well too.

]]> By: Mary http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3433 Mary Sun, 26 Apr 2009 20:18:11 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3433 Cindy, I can identify with how you feel. We're all at various stages of grief. Some people are newly bereaved and raw, others are further along the path, and then others think their grief is behind them until they get walloped by an unexpected tidal wave of emotion. I, too, thought that year 2 was a lot harder than year 1. Partially because everyone else (except the bereaved) is back to their normal lives. February 1 marked the beginning of year 3, and only now am I beginning to make changes in my physical environment: and only now am I contemplating the possibility of a new love coming into my life. Hugs, Mary Cindy, I can identify with how you feel. We’re all at various stages of grief. Some people are newly bereaved and raw, others are further along the path, and then others think their grief is behind them until they get walloped by an unexpected tidal wave of emotion. I, too, thought that year 2 was a lot harder than year 1. Partially because everyone else (except the bereaved) is back to their normal lives. February 1 marked the beginning of year 3, and only now am I beginning to make changes in my physical environment: and only now am I contemplating the possibility of a new love coming into my life.
Hugs,
Mary

]]> By: Anger and Grief : Widows Quest - Redefine Yourself and Rediscover Life after a Loss http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3430 Anger and Grief : Widows Quest - Redefine Yourself and Rediscover Life after a Loss Sun, 26 Apr 2009 18:36:02 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3430 [...] plays with our emotions. Cindy, one of our Widows Quest regular commenters, yesterday felt angry, felt depressed and I felt so sorry for her because I know that feeling. Anger rises when you feel out of control. [...] [...] plays with our emotions. Cindy, one of our Widows Quest regular commenters, yesterday felt angry, felt depressed and I felt so sorry for her because I know that feeling. Anger rises when you feel out of control. [...]

]]> By: Anna Farmery http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3429 Anna Farmery Sun, 26 Apr 2009 18:21:18 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3429 CIndy - you don't need to apologise. We understand the anger, that feeling that reading this blog just doesn't give you that answer to how to live with the pain....because it can't the only one answer is allowing time to heal which none of us want to hear.....I hope you stay with our group and join in our first monthly telephone call http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/support-group-at-widows-quest/#comment-3409 As the more we reach out, the more we will help each other Anna xx CIndy – you don’t need to apologise. We understand the anger, that feeling that reading this blog just doesn’t give you that answer to how to live with the pain….because it can’t the only one answer is allowing time to heal which none of us want to hear…..I hope you stay with our group and join in our first monthly telephone call

http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/support-group-at-widows-quest/#comment-3409

As the more we reach out, the more we will help each other

Anna xx

]]> By: Cindy http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3410 Cindy Sat, 25 Apr 2009 16:35:04 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3410 Annna, I'm sorry. I just have been overreacting to everything lately. The first year after Don died was a piece of cake compared to this year. I've been in bed with the flu, and alone, for over 10 days and now I am having lots of trouble with depression. You are right - it's focused when it is your own journey with grief and you have done a lot of good here. I know you will continue to do so. Cindy Annna, I’m sorry. I just have been overreacting to everything lately. The first year after Don died was a piece of cake compared to this year. I’ve been in bed with the flu, and alone, for over 10 days and now I am having lots of trouble with depression.

You are right – it’s focused when it is your own journey with grief and you have done a lot of good here. I know you will continue to do so.

Cindy

]]> By: Anna Farmery http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3405 Anna Farmery Sat, 25 Apr 2009 08:21:49 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3405 Cindy I am sorry if you feel that way, the site cannot be totally focused as it is a personal reflection of my journey through grief. Yours is the first comment that says it is unhelpful so I hope for many the site provides support. I hope that you do return and I hope also that you cope with your grief and find the support you need. I wish you all the best Cindy

I am sorry if you feel that way, the site cannot be totally focused as it is a personal reflection of my journey through grief. Yours is the first comment that says it is unhelpful so I hope for many the site provides support. I hope that you do return and I hope also that you cope with your grief and find the support you need.

I wish you all the best

]]> By: Cindy http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/the-river-of-grief/comment-page-1/#comment-3403 Cindy Sat, 25 Apr 2009 06:30:02 +0000 http://www.blisstree.com/widowsquest/?p=1387#comment-3403 I found this site helpful for some time but lately it seems to be very facile and unfocused and with nothing that really makes me learn from my "widows; Quest". I will not give up and will check in now and then. I need a site that deals with my grief and fight for growth and contentment. All of the asides about positive thinking, success tips, on and on I have known about for many years but my loss of my spouse is a whole different type of challenge. Wishing you the best. Cindy I found this site helpful for some time but lately it seems to be very facile and unfocused and with nothing that really makes me learn from my “widows; Quest”. I will not give up and will check in now and then.

I need a site that deals with my grief and fight for growth and contentment. All of the asides about positive thinking, success tips, on and on I have known about for many years but my loss of my spouse is a whole different type of challenge.

Wishing you the best. Cindy

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