1. I can …rather than I can’t..
2. I will… rather than I will never
3. I can cope…
4. I enjoy living…rather than I feel guilty living
5. I will do it today…rather than I will think about it tomorrow
6. I feel grateful for having them in my life…rather than I hate the fact they are gone
7. I feel proud of the way I…..rather than why can’t I…..
8. Can’t wait for 2010, it will be a new start…rather than when will 2009 end
9. I accept what has happened…rather than why did this happen?
10. It is time for me to move on…rather than holding on to the past

What would you suggest gets added to the list?

Post from: Widows Quest

“your life’s footprint’s will not be washed away by the tide of grief”

When our loved ones leave us sometimes I think that we hold on to the memories as tight as we can because we fear if we let go then somehow

• We are doing something wrong
• We may forget them
• Others may forget them

On those days when you feel guilty or you feel fear then remember what I said at Nana’s funeral. They may be gone from our everyday lives but we will NEVER, NEVER forget them from our hearts.

Post from: Widows Quest

“You are as young as you faith, as old as your doubt; as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fears; as young as your hope, as old as your despair. In the central place of every heart, there is a recording chamber, so long as it receives messages of beauty and hope, cheer and courage, you are young. When the wires are all down and your heart is covered with the snows of pessimism and the ice of opinion, then and only then, have you grown old”

(General MacArthur)

How true this is…..how much do you invest your time in creating beauty and hope? How much cheer do you search for? Human life is short – we know more than most – lets not waste it with “snows of pessimism” but the “sunshine of hope”

Post from: Widows Quest

Cheryl Ragsdale presents Faith, a Two-Legged Dog, Walks Upright Like a Human posted at That Girl is Funny, saying, ” Faith shows every day the strength and wonder of life – and that the things you never thought could happen – will one day become a reality.”

Vincent presents Rocky Balboa’s Lessons On Life posted at Hit Your Goals.

Kaushik Chokshi presents Saying Aloha to Fear posted at Beyond Karma, saying, “Positivity does not come from positive thinking. It is already here in abundance when fear is let go of.”

Positive Present presents are the people in your life positive? posted at positively present.

christopher foster presents How quickly an intention can manifest posted at thehappyseeker.com.

presents The Driving Force of Tremendous Change posted at The Real Mind, saying, “My guide to finding your root motivation for obtaining positive change.”

Elisha Webster Emerson presents A Little Angst Cannot be Helped posted at My Inconvenient Body, saying, “Angst may be a viable emotion, but here are some ways to keep it in check.”

Danea Horn presents Turning Negatives Into Positives posted at Affirmation Blog.

Michael Hogg presents Personal Goal Setting posted at michaelhogg.org.

Albie presents I find that, above all, the soul wants stories. posted at iDevelopWorld.

Joshua VanKirk presents How to stay positive posted at Your life. Your zen.

Anna presents Has the world changed really? posted at The Engaging Brand

Aparna presents Develop a positive attitude posted at Beauty and Personality Grooming, saying, “A positive attitude or outlook on life can lead to positive behavior and success. A person with a positive behavior draws others’ like a magnet.”

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of positive thinking using our carnival submission form.

Post from: Widows Quest

When you think of the joyous times you spent with your loved ones, how many of them were just simple experience…maybe laughing over nothing, or a walk on the beach….or a text message that meant the world.

When you think of grief, the answer to the reason why they have been taken from us is ..simple. There is no reason just that it was their time. The answer to how to start to enjoy life again is simple….one step at a time – with friends.

So much of life is simple…we are born, we die and hopefully in between we love. It is only us humans that make it complex, do we create that complexity from over thinking, or wanting to understand why? When in reality our parents were right when as children we asked “But why?” And they asnwered “Because”

To return to living, we need to return to a simple life.

Post from: Widows Quest

Today I returned to work and as always felt that overpowering power of “What is the point?” Now I don’t say this for any other reason that if other widows or widowers are feeling that….well, that is normal.

Loss throws life into turmoil. Our loved ones are our rocks, our stabilizing factors in the turbulent sea of life. But you know instead of wallowing I immersed myself and tried to get back to some normality. I understand that it doesn’t feel right, it doesn’t feel as though it has any meaning…but it will.

When faced with grief we can either whither away or we can stand up for all the values that we shared with those people we have lost. Nana was a hard worker, she believed in working for everything you got….and today I stood by those values. Not because I wanted to…but because that is what she would have wanted.

And do you know at the end of today I have achieved something. I have cleared some work and most of all proved that life goes on. I have proved to myself that the more I try to love this world without her, the more I will. I have proved to myself that I am strong and resourceful and I am proud of that…

Grief can leave you numb….but deep inside we can find the strength to carry on….deep inside we know that life will never be the same but that life is precious and we should all treasure it.

Post from: Widows Quest

“Life is a series of memories, life is about creating those memories”

I then asked so what is death all about

“No one knows but for those left behind it is about cherishing those memories”

She told me the best way to live life was to think about each day and put into your memory box (thoughts) the precious moments which you want to keep. That way on bad days you have a store of happiness to recharge the batteries.

I always loved this idea that life is a series of memories, and if when you are grieving it can be a wonderful way to think about your loss. After all we may not have their wisdom, or their presence but we do have their love and we have their wisdom through memories.

Grief is natural but lets never let that cloud the joy of having them in our lives.

Post from: Widows Quest

why theydie….because they do.

No answer that will take away the pain, no answer that will change the fact they are gone. Sat with Nana, I started questioning the world and came up with these 10 questions which constantly haunt me

1. Is there anything else I could have done differently?
2. Why now?
3. Why them?
4. Why take the good ones?
5. How can I live without them?
6. Did they know how loved they were?
7. What is the point of life without them?
8. How will I cope?
9. Why go on?
10. Are they watching over me?

These are my questions, I am sure that grief brings others into your mind. I smile because the answer to most of these questions is – and will remain – unknown. Isn’t that where the pain truly lies…that there are no answers to the loss of a loved one?

H

Post from: Widows Quest

Waiting to die or

Waiting to live?

I always assumed death was the most fearful, after all once it happens who truly knows. That fear of the unknown I am sure has brought Nana back from the edge at least twice this week.

But then you look at the life of a widow or widower after bereavement. That lack of acceptance means that we don’t move on, living is as fearful to the survivor as often death can be to the dying.

In both situations the fear is based on the unknown – though I accept with faith this may not be true. But as I sit here now I realise that as long as it remains unknown…the fear will be there….if we take one step at a time to remove the unknown, well then the fear will eventually be engulfed through confidence and enjoyment

The question we need to ask is

‘Do we really want people to see us as waiting to live then waiting to die…or dying to live!’

Post from: Widows Quest

I am thinking of the special moments we cherish, I am thinking of how important it is that we find a way to cherish our own moments. We may live alone now, we may feel the pain of loneliness, we may think our hearts will never mend…but somehow we all at Widows Quest find a way…

Time is not infinite, time in a sense is all we have…this is no longer our time together but our time to find ourselves, our passions, our future. I know from looking at Nana that if I asked her what she wanted it would be time with us all, we have something so precious we must learn not to waste one second….

Post from: Widows Quest