The 5th of November, 6 years ago at 8.08pm was a sad day for our family. We lost Dad who was such a wonderful gentleman..and gentle man. I will never forget being there with mum as he said goodbye to the world with fireworks lighting up the earth (It is Bonfire night in the UK on the 5th) We always liked to think of that as the world celebrating his life and sending him on his way with such a fitting tribute.
Today I am in London, away from my special mum who I know reads this blog. I hope that …read more

The loss of a child, well I just cannot imagine the pain. I cannot imagine finding the strength to write about it but I was emailed about a book from Shirley Enebrad. Now I haven’t read the book but wanted to share some of the story and lessons from cancer

More children die from cancer than all of the other diseases combined,

“The flip side of placing a high value on human life is the fear of dying,” said Enebrad, author of Over the Rainbow Bridge “My son, Cory, never looked at that side of the coin. …read more

I met up with an old school friend at the weekend. She has lost her husband – who she met at primary school, a real love story – and has 3 small children. She talked to me about how hard it is to have lost the only man she had ever been with, not only loved. How difficult it is to keep positive for her young children….
But then she shared with me a wonderful idea.
What she did was go and buy some disposable cameras. She gave one to each child and asked them to take photos which reflected
How they used …read more

Today – the Glorious 12th as we know it in the UK – is my Dad’s birthday.
Dad was a wonderful gentleman who is missed very much from our lives. The years go by since we lost him from our lives but I can tell you, he is never far from our minds.
I had the privilege – and it was a true privilege – to speak at the funeral on behalf of my mum. I wanted to share with you today a little of what I said
“…As he did fall asleep there were fireworks to be heard and seen outside …read more

I remember so clearly losing Dad and promising him that I would look after the lady he had loved so much – my mum. Well today she is celebrating her 79th birthday. I still live too far away to nip in for a cup of coffee and some of her gorgeous home baking but I did go and see her this weekend and we went out for tea.
I love my mum so much, I am lucky that we have always had a special connection. I used to spend hours sat on her knee as a child and we share a …read more

The music at a funeral can be very emotive and I know how important it is to choose the right song. We had a question

earlier this week about songs which are suitable for childrens funerals. I found a website that suggests
Funeral Songs and Memorial Music for a Child’s Service

My Heart Will Go On – performed by Celine Dion (Sample lyrics – “Every night in my dreams I see you, I feel you, that is how I know you go on”
In Dreams – performed by Roy Orbison (Sample lyrics – “In dreams I walk with you. in dreams I talk …read more

Rob Gordon has sent a link to a book which helps children coping with grief. It is called Someone I love is Dying. I haven’t read the book but if you know someone with children it may be worth checking out. It is described as
” a tool for children and parents dealing with terminal illness and the loss of a loved one. The beginning children’s story highlights various stages of grief and concludes with a journal. The journal is used to record the child’s feelings while creating their very own memory book.”

My friend who I have written about before lost her husband a couple of years ago. At the time the children seemed to cope with the loss relatively well, yet recently they have had some behavioral problems. When she talked to them they told her that they wanted to see Daddy and how they wanted to talk to him, that they had never really said goodbye.
The other day she took them to a park which they used to visit as a family. She gave them some paper and a pen each. She asked them to write down what they wanted …read more

When Dad died one good thing that came of it was a closeness with my mum. Mum and I have always had a special bond but somehow we had grown apart unknowingly. During the time Dad was ill, that closeness reformed and to this day..Mum and I have a new relationship.
They say for every death there is  a birth and that was the case for me and my parents. That nagging regret about Dad, about not spending enough time with him, has ensured that I will never have the same regret with Mum. Ahead of tomorrow here are 5 reasons …read more

Grief although such a natural emotion – one that will happen to all of us at some time during our life -  it can cause such unnatural emotions and changes to our bodies and minds.
It is strange, grief feels uncontrollable and yet if we let grief control us, then we can potentially rot inside our soul.
I believe that we need to allow the grief to flow….but that is us allowing ourselves so we are in control!….then we need to find the strength to turn the grief into positive change. If we let go emotionally and let grief take hold then …read more