I went to see Mum again this weekend and something struck me – how incredible photo’s are.
In Mum’s kitchen there is a photo of Dad when he was a toddler, I picked it up and couldn’t believe it when it was the same facial expression, same posture in a photo that Dad took of me many years ago. The photo showed me two things
1) How incredible that a camera can look at someone and ensure that for years ahead people can see what the camera saw all these years ago. Photo’s capture a time, photo’s even capture emotion in a …read more

Just 23 minutes to go until Christmas day
A day when familys gather and smiles fill the air
Oh, 7 hours and 23 minutes until I wake
And realise once again, YOU my soulmate, are not there

But fear not world I will put on the paint
And sense your warmth from up above
Which will get me through the day, a day of loss
Through the one thing you gave me, they could not take away….
…Your love.

Happy Christmas, love you as much today as when you went away….

The events of this week have really affected me, bringing back painful memories. However it has made me realise that I am alive

We understand how quickly life can be taken away so enjoy the moments you have
We understand the pain of loss so support and help others as a way of creating a legacy to remember
Humans are frail and humans are not perfect. Humans do inexplicable things however it is our imperfection that make us human. The world would be safer we if were all good and automatons but would it be better?

This is probably the topic I get asked about the most…and I will post over the next week some financial advice that I have found has helped me. Today I wanted to tell you how I started to raise some money…I know they are not long term solutions but they helped in the short term

I sold my CD’s on Amazon….I had collected many and I copied them onto my PC and then sold them…it brought in $200 per month which helped a lot.
I cleaned other people’s houses who were working and who wanted someone they can trust. I hate cleaning …read more

I don’t believe on holding on to the past, I have done it but all it did was drain me and increase the hurt. So I have given a lot away to charity but there are certain keepsakes that will never leave my house.

An old tatty jumper  – I have no idea why but it comforts me especially on the long nights.
2 Photos that I love which are in pride of place near the tv
A copy of the speech that I had made at the funeral
My ring

I think we all need some level of comfort, something that reminds us of …read more

I am not sure what I think about what a Northern Ireland undertaker is offering, which I read on Engadget. Here are the details
“Northern Ireland undertaker Jim Clarke has added a macabre new feature to their funeral services: webcasting. The bereaved now have the (thankfully free) option of enabling live streams from a network of webcams and mics recently installed by S Clarke and Son Funeral Directors in local funeral homes and churches. “Our internet option means [mourners] get to become part of a grieving process they might have missed out on. … The pictures are so clear that people …read more

Dealing with all the finances can be so difficult and a site that can help is unwanted change I am a Chartered Accountant by trade so therefore finance has never had a fear for me, but this paragraph on the site brought home to me the difficulties….
“In fact AARP research shows that of the estimated 13 million widowed Americans, more than 11 million of them are women. What’s more, 80 to 90 percent of all women have never handled their finances before. That means that the vast majority of women haven’t had experience in handling their own finances yet they …read more

I subscribe to a wonderful daily newsletter from Lou Tice which you can subscibe to here. I received this one today and thought I would share it with you. Firstly, because they way we think when we lose someone is so important and also because if your partner is ill, it shows the importance of how you think on your health. Lou says
“Can the mind help cure disease? What role do the emotions play in preventing illness?
What is the relationship between the thoughts you think, the feelings you experience, and the overall health and well being of your body? This …read more

Birthdays as I said yesterday are tough, they are days that you want to share with people you love. But here are my ways of making the day as happy as possible.
B= Be generous to yourself. Buy a gift for yourself, something that you really want…a gift to say how well you have coped with the loss.

I=Imagine how hard it is for others to know how to say the right thing today. Understand and be open, make it easy for them to love you today. They want you to be happy, allow them to help you be happy today, no …read more

In yesterdays positive thinking carnival there was a post from Walt on Pain is a Highly Concentrated Thought. This had a lasting effect on me especially the quote “The solution to that would be to not think so much on a bad experience, but rather if the thought comes up, think about what good it did for you.” The post goes on to say
“Remember that time when you had a headache or your foot hurt? It hurt and hurt mainly due to your concentration on the pain. But, when your focus and attention shifted to something else, the more you …read more