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Tuesday, December 8th, 2009

Widows Quest

When Life Doesn’t Feel Worth the Pain

July 22, 2008 by Anna Farmery  
Filed under Loneliness, Guilt & Depression

There are days when all of us wonder whether the pain is worth it, when we have no fight left in our body, when we cannot face waking up the next morning….

When that happens it is overwhelming and difficult to deal with, you know there are things in your life that “should” be making you happy, you know that you “should” be grateful for what you have….yet our concentration is on what you haven’t got.

I have never found the right words to comfort myself or others in this situation – I would love to hear your ideas?

But if that is how you are feeling then just hold on to life as tightly as you can…..if you take your own life, then all you do is pass the pain from your heart to others. All you do is remove another good person from the world , who brings love to a world so much in need of as much love it can find.

Life may seem meaningless, life may seem not worth it…..but as my Dad once said “Don’t give in to the pain, the pain is there so that you enjoy, really enjoy the good times. Pain will not destroy you, only losing the capacity to love. So when you feel down, reach out to love…...loving is the one thing that pain cannot survive” 

I think he was right. He didn’t mean love in a purely sexual sense but love manonledge.jpg in the   desire to make all those around you happy, love in the sense of bringing value to the  life of others. 

….And hold on tight to the knowledge that one day, one day you will be so grateful for hanging tough in those dark days.

{iStockphoto}

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Comments

2 Responses to “When Life Doesn’t Feel Worth the Pain”
  1. Vic says:

    Hi Anna, I’ve blogged about this:

    http://www.myspouseisdead.com/2008/05/how-to-help-new-widow-or-widower.html

    In general, though, I find it most helpful to say nothing. *Listening* is way more helpful than talking ;-)

  2. Anna says:

    Vic

    Will go and check it out. I have learned through my own grief that being there – listening, holding is so much more powerful than the words.

    Anna

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